#which I couldn't ever in my life afford
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theunmarkedtombstone · 11 days ago
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Not to vent online cause I hate doing that but hmmm wish I could not see anything abt MCR rn.
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damienthepious · 5 months ago
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also also youtube sucks so fucking bad. it sucks so fucking bad. i've been watching a bunch of stuff on nebula the last couple days, in browser and not even in like, an app, and the experience is ten thousand percent better. i can go to a fucking different tab and it keeps playing! if my wifi detonates and i need to refresh the page it REMEMBERS WHERE I WAS IN THE VIDEO! THEY PAY THEIR GODDAMN CREATORS!!!!
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tittyinfinity · 1 month ago
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i wish my hearing wasn't so damn sensitive. i have white noise playing loud af when i go to bed so I won't hear anything else. the power went out twice last night which of course shut off the white noise. first i woke up to the sound of my cat chewing, the 2nd time I woke up to someone walking on the other side of the house. why does autism/misophonia have to do that omg
on the bright side having sensitive hearing isn't all that bad bc when i listen to music i can pick out every single instrument's part and learn how to play every part on every instrument i own so that's an autism win for sure. we have a badass electric piano from 1989 that lets you record multiple tracks at once. so when I was in band, I'd learn every instrument's part, record each of them, play them all at once, then practice my part on my instrument (viola, clarinet, bass clarinet, saxophone) along with it. like i said. autism for the win. sometimes
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luvsavos · 10 months ago
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i am once again apologizing for my lack of activity/responsiveness
my childhood cat passed away a few days ago which has just been more stuff on top of everything else for me to deal with to stress me out and upset me
i'll try to get back to stuff. Eventually. as soon as i can</3
#mar.txt#still very much upset about losing him,but it's kind of faded for numbness now#still not holding up great though especially considering how sudden it was#he was all fine and healthy and then just suddenly started to rapidly go downhill and within like. two days he was gone#he was so weak. couldn't move almost at all,his meows were barely just meow-sounding exhales. the last two things he did were#getting my attention so i would come to him,then attempted to crawl onto my lap and despite me being less than a foot away he couldn't make#it. so i brought him onto my bed on my lap with me. and then at some point later after another sudden onset of diarrhea (which seemed to#take absolutely all of his remaining strength) and i'd brought him back to my bed after cleaning the poop off of him he got my attention to#move his head so he could look up at me. and that's how he passed. looking up at me.#despite everything,he was purring. so weak and faint i could hardly feel it,but. he was purring,maybe until the moment he finally passed.#he was obviously suffering. and we couldn't afford to get someone to put him down so we just did what we could for him.#i'm glad that,at least,he was happy in his final moments. he wanted to be with me and i'm glad i could give him that. i HAD needed to go out#that day but i opted to stay home because i was worried he'd pass while i was gone. sure enough if i had gone out he would have.#i'm glad i could give him the comfort and company he wanted in his final moments. i'm glad i made him happy enough in them to purr even#despite how weak he was. i'm glad he didn't pass alone and possibly in pain.#ive lost a lot of pets in my life. but amos? he's only like. three years younger than me? we practically grew up together. ive known him his#entire life. no amount of being told it hurts to lose a childhood pet will ever compare to the reality of it happening.#i buried him outside my window. so he's close to home.#vent post? i guess?
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falesten-iw · 1 month ago
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On this day last year, my family faced a choice no one should ever have to make: stay in their home in Gaza and risk death or flee south, clinging to the slim hope of finding safety. Spoiler alert: there was no “right” answer. In Gaza, there never is. Families like mine would run from areas labeled dangerous, only to be bombed in so-called ‘humanitarian’ zones. Because in Gaza, no place is truly safe.
Each time they evacuated, they had the same gut-wrenching, desperate conversations on repeat: “Should we stay or go? Where would we even go? Do we send the women and children first, or do we all stick together?” Imagine trying to make life-and-death decisions with bombs falling around you.
One evening, a family friend offered them shelter, hoping the madness would calm down in a few days. My brothers agreed to move everyone there the next morning. But the bombs beat them to it. Just hours after that phone call, Israeli airstrikes hit our friend’s house. Thirty-five people, including children, gone. They never got a chance to move, and instead, they grieved for the lives lost.
They ran to Khan Younis, only for tragedy to follow. In November 2023, Israeli bombs hit my cousin’s house. I lost three cousins, their wives, and their children. It was chaos. Pieces of people scattered everywhere. A small child’s body lay unrecognizable until my cousin realized it was her son, Odi. His head was almost gone, but she knew him. She knew him by the shape of his teeth, his little toes. That’s the kind of loss no mother should ever face.
Since then, my family has moved over 50 times, haunted by the same questions: Where can they go next? How can they afford to survive another evacuation? Will they even manage to set up another flimsy tent?
And speaking of tents, imagine trying to live in one with your children. Picture makeshift cesspits serving as toilets, which fill up in a few weeks, forcing them to dig another. Comfort? Safety? Those words mean nothing. How do you sleep at night when your ‘home’ is a tent and your bathroom is a hole in the ground?
Talking about my family and Gaza breaks me, yet it also brings me a strange comfort. I refuse to let their stories fade. Their memories are beacons in the darkness, bittersweet reminders of joy and sorrow.
My family needs urgent help to survive this ongoing nightmare. Please, donate if you can. Share our story with your friends and family. Help us keep fighting, keep surviving.
Vetted and shared by @90-ghost: Link.
Verified and shared by @el-shab-hussein: Link
Listed as number 282 in "The Vetted Gaza Evacuation Fundraiser Spreadsheet" compiled by @el-shab-hussein and @nabulsi : Link
Listed on the Butterfly Effect Project, number 957: Link
Additionally, Al Jazeera News has documented apart of my family's case: Link
If, for some reason, you couldn't donate via GoFundMe, you can donate via PayPal instead.
Note: There’s even a raffle for a handmade Palestinian thob if you want to participate : Link
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numinous-scribe · 9 months ago
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Siblings by trial and choice
So @noir-renard posted a prompt in Haunting Heroes a little while ago that's had me in a perpetual choke hold ever since.
When the Portal ZAPS Danny, he doesn't just get turned into a half ghost; he gets catapulted halfway across the galaxy. So now he's stuck on an alien ship, trying to deal with new powers, and desperately searching for a way home.
And my immediate thought was "How can I make this about Starfire?", from which everything spiraled.
[Click the pictures for better quality!]
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Having assumed that the portal wasn't even supposed to be functional, Danny had absolutely no basis for anything that was happening to him. Not his new look or powers, not for wherever he was, and certainly not for the predicament of where he landed-- A ship he would later come to know as belonging to the slavers known as the Gordanians.
For all Danny knew, he certainly wasn't human anymore, and he might not have even been in the same dimension either; while Earth had been seeing more and more interactions with aliens, he'd never seen any quiet like these, and his parents had said that the portal was designed to view a whole other world.
And that was terrifying! He was Danny Fenton, just fourteen, and so far out of his depth it wasn't even funny. If it weren't for Koriand'r then Danny didn't know how he would have kept it all together.
As it were, Kor'i had already been enslaved for four years by this point. She knew what it was like to suddenly be cut off from everything she'd ever known, and the torment that was awaiting this strange boy that had appeared in a flash of green light. So even though she had nothing to give, Kor'i stuck by Danny's side.
Together, for the next two years, they fed each other hope.
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Naturally, returning to Earth was a big ordeal for Danny, and by proxy for Kor'i as well. Over the two years they spent enduring harsh labor and torture from both their Gordanian captors and the Psions, Danny had confided in all sorts of stories about his home world and vice versa Kor'i about Tamaran. After confirming that he hadn't been transported to another reality, and that this was his Earth, Danny had been so excited to return home and to introduce Kor'i to his friends and family.
But while Earth was still the same, home... was not.
His parents were in jail; not only for their unethical and code violating lab, but because they were so neglectful to the point that minors were able to get into the lab unsupervised and one of them— Danny —was able to access their faulty machine and, presumably, died.
Jazz got picked up by the state, but quickly managed to get herself emancipated and now lived in some other state attending college.
The Manson's moved. Sam was a wreck and not coping well at all; her parents were considering having her committed to an institution for a bit to help her last anyone had heard.
The Foley's couldn't afford to move, so Tucker had to carry on with life as well as he could. He's quiet now, not as verbose and shameless as before, more of a hermit than anything.
And since he's been presumed dead, and can't figure out how to disprove that, honestly, Danny doesn't know how to pick back up where he left off. He can't. Because everything, including him, has changed as well.
But, like she's always done since the moment they met, Kor'i was there for him. And now they have a new family in the Teen Titans as well.
Bonus:
Close ups of Phantom and Starfire. Danny's suit design is a mixture of some of his original concept art and @the-stove-is-on-fire's designs :)
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vanessagillings · 8 months ago
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I’m posting the ever-so-rare photo of myself alongside one of my characters based on my childhood because today is World Autism Acceptance Day, and I wanted to show my little corner of the internet who this particular autistic person is:  
I was officially diagnosed in February, at age 38 (I’m now 39). A lot of people thought I couldn’t be autistic.  Some people who know me in real life still don’t.  And until around 10 years ago, I didn’t think I could be either, because I was nothing like the stereotype media portrays. I was told that autistics lacked empathy (untrue), and never played make-believe (also often untrue) and only enjoyed STEM.  I was — and am — an empathetic artist -- and make believe?  I can spend days sketching finely bedecked bears brewing tea or carefully choosing the right words to weave tapestries of fiction — though perhaps my hyper focus was a bit of a red flag.  Even so, how could autism describe me?  I was a good student.  I got straight A's. I didn’t act out in class.  I can make eye contact…if I must.  And lots of girls hate having their hair brushed with an unholy passion, right?  Clearly I swim in sarcasm like a fish, so autism couldn't be why I was so anxious all the time, could it?
If someone had told me when I was younger what autism ACTUALLY is — instead of the nonsense I’d seen on screens — I would have seen myself in it.  I didn’t hear that autistics have sensory issues until I was in my mid-twenties, which is when I first began to really research autism symptoms, and I had almost all of them:  sensitivity to light, smells, fabrics, temperatures, textures, and certain touches, all of which make me feel anxious, I fidget (stim), I never know what the hell to do with my hands or where to look, I talk too little or too much, I have special interests, I have entire animated movies memorized shot-by-shot and can remember the first time and place I saw every movie I've ever seen but I often forget what I'm trying to say mid-sentence, I echo movies and tv shows (my husband and I have a whole repertoire of shared echolalias, making up about 20% of our conversations), I was in speech therapy as a kid, I have issues with dysnomia and verbal fluency, I toe-walk, I can't multitask to save my life, I like things just-so, I’m deeply introverted but not shy, I need to recover from all social interaction — even social interaction I enjoy — and I find stupid, every day things like grocery shopping, driving and making appointments overwhelming and intensely stressful, sometimes to the point where I struggle to speak.  It turns out, I am definitely autistic. My results weren't borderline. Not even close. And while these aren’t all of my challenges, and not everyone with these symptoms is autistic, it’s definitely something to look into if you present with all of these things at once. 
So why did it take me so long to get diagnosed? The same bias that exists in media threads through the medical community as well, and because I'm a woman who can discuss the weather while smiling on cue, few people thought I was worth looking into. Even after I was fairly certain I was autistic, receiving an official diagnosis in the US is unnecessarily difficult and expensive, and in my case, completely uncovered by my insurance.  It cost me over $4000, and I could only afford it because my husband makes more money than I do as a freelance illustrator — a job I fell into largely because it didn’t require in-person work; like many autists, I have been chronically underemployed and underpaid, in part due to physical illness in my twenties, which is a topic for another day.  But it shouldn’t be like this.  It shouldn’t be so hard for adults to receive diagnoses and it shouldn’t be so hard for people to see themselves in this condition to begin with due to misinformation and stereotypes. Like many issues in America, these barriers are even higher for marginalized groups with multiple intersectionalities. 
It’s commonly said that if you’ve met one autistic person, you’ve met one autistic person.  This is why it’s called a spectrum, not because there’s a linear progression of severity (someone who appears to have low support needs like myself might need more than it seems, and vice versa), but because every autistic person has their own strengths and weaknesses, challenges and experiences, opinions and needs.  No two people on the spectrum present in the same way.  And that’s a good thing!  No way of being autistic is inherently any better than any other, and even if someone on the spectrum struggles with things I don’t — or can do things I can’t — doesn’t make them more or less deserving of respect and human dignity.
But speaking solely for myself, the more I learn about autism, the happier I am to be autistic.  I struggle to find words and exert fine motor control, but my deep passion and fixation has made me good at art and storytelling anyway.  I find more joy watching dogs and studying leaf shapes on my walks than most people do in an entire day.  More often than not, the barriers I’ve faced weren’t due to my autism directly, but due to society being overly rigid about what it considers a valid way of existing.  My hope in writing this today is that maybe one person will realize that autism isn’t what they thought — and that being different is not the same as being less than. My hope with my fiction is to give autistic children mirrors with which to see themselves, and everyone else windows through which to see us as we actually are.
If you’re interested in learning more about autism or think you might be autistic, too, I recommend the Autism Self Advocacy Network  autisticadvocacy.org and the following books:
What I Mean When I Say I’m Autistic by Annie Kotowicz
We're Not Broken by Eric Garcia
Knowing Why edited by Elizabeth Bartmess
Unmasking Autism by Devon Price, PhD
Loud Hands edited by Julia Bascom
Neurotribes by Steve Silberman
(trigger warning: the last two contain quite a lot of upsetting material involving institutionalized child abuse, but I think it’s important for people to know how often autistic children were — and are — abused simply for being neurodivergent).
Thanks for reading 💛
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roosterforme · 4 months ago
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Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw Part 17 | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Bradley was certain Maverick didn't intend to stress him out when he said you and he were the spitting image of Goose and Carole. But suddenly, for better or for worse, it was all he could think about. There is so much to look forward to with you in his life, but now he has to break the worst kind of news to you.
Warnings: Fluff, oral sex, smut, angst, adult banter, Bradley in love, 18+
Length: 4800 words
Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female teacher!Reader
Check out my masterlist for more! Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw masterlist
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Bradley couldn't seem to stop grinning. Playing the part of tour guide for your class was a pleasure. The kids made fun of Jake, which was honestly lovely, and everyone got to experience different aspects of aviation, not just flying. You even made Cyclone smile, so you'd done the impossible there. Bradley had a grin on his face for the rest of the afternoon, and Nat kept ribbing him about it.
"Are the two of you going to get married and have eighteen kids?" she asked, feigning innocence like nobody else could.
"I know you're joking," he replied as he cleaned up and organized all of the noise canceling headphones. "You know how I know? Because you know how much money I make. I could never afford eighteen kids. It's gotta be like fifteen, tops."
"You never ever even joked about having a child before!" she said, tone accusatory.
Talking about you and thinking about you made him feel calm where no relationship he'd had in the past ever really did. "Come on, Nat. You know I'm serious about this one." 
She laughed in response. "Being in love for once instead of just settling for someone to keep you company looks good on you. It's about time you stopped fucking up." He planted his hand on top of her head, scrunched his fingers, and messed up her hair. "Stop it!" she screeched as he ran away across the tarmac as fast as he could and into the hangar where he found Marty.
Bradley peeked around to make sure she hadn't followed him as he made a beeline toward the mechanic. "Hey, I can't thank you enough for today," he told Marty, shaking his calloused hand.
"It was fun," he replied. "Some of those kids are future aviators, I'm telling you."
"Violet," they both said at the same time and started laughing.
"And Oliver is a bit of a daredevil," Bradley added as he helped Marty pack up his work station. "They've been learning about aviation for months, and I know today meant a lot to them."
Marty looked a little pensive before he nodded at Bradley. "You know what," he said in response as he locked his toolbox, "go ahead and tell your girlfriend that I'll be there for her career day as long as I'm not deployed."
Bradley cocked his head. "Career day. Right. I'll let her know." 
He had no idea what Marty was talking about, but it was just about time for him to head out for the day. By the time he got home from work, you'd probably be on your way back down from Mira Mesa. His thoughts were circling around Maverick's words from earlier. If he was reminded of Goose and Carole when he looked at Bradley with you, then no wonder this felt like the real deal. It must be just that.
But he was in his head now. He was desperate to keep you, because he knew all too well what loneliness felt like, but he couldn't stand the thought of you worrying about him. And the idea of anything happening to him while he was away from you was too much to handle. He rubbed his eyes as he walked to his Bronco. Being compared to his parents felt like a blessing and a curse.
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The evenings were getting chilly this time of year, but you changed into the dress you wore on your first date with Bradley as soon as you got home. Then you quickly packed an overnight bag. Driving to work from his house tomorrow would be a true test. Nothing was going to be a complete deal breaker for you at this point, but you hoped it didn't leave you in tears of frustration. Or have Bradley trying to scramble to find a way to try to make you happy when you already were.
Your plan for the evening was to pick up some Thai food from the place he loved on your way to his house. When you texted Bradley to let him know you were leaving your place soon and that you hoped he was hungry, he wrote back one sentence.
All I want is you.
Every time you thought it would be impossible for him to continue to set off the butterflies in your tummy, he did it again. Your face felt warm, and you ran your palm along your cheek as you thought about every little detail of the field trip while you drove. He didn't just love you, he appreciated your job and your students. Your ex didn't even let you talk about them. Bradley let them rank the cafeteria foods at the Naval base. He got Marty to give a demonstration. He got permission for them to sit in his jet and assist with air traffic control!
You moaned as you wove through traffic to get there. All I want is you. Well fuck, all you wanted was him. Your feelings outweighed the amount of time you'd known him, but you couldn't seem to make yourself pump the brakes now. When you stopped to pick up dinner, you thought back to your first date with Bradley. It wasn't very long ago, but it felt like so much had happened since then. It felt like even more had happened since he responded to your first letter. In such a short amount of time, you had fallen in love.
Your skin was tingling with anticipation as you parked in front of his house. Hadn't you been with him just a few hours ago? Why did you feel the need to run for the front door with the Thai food? Why did your heart skip a beat when Bradley opened the door in his sweatshirt and gray sweatpants and met you on the front porch before you even had a chance to knock?
"Gorgeous," he breathed against your cheek, holding you close as you tried not to squish the bag containing dinner. Then he pulled his shirt off, leaving him in a tee, and tugged it over your head. His mustache tickled your skin as he leaned in and whispered, "You look too good in my sweatshirt. You look like you're mine."
Your belly swooped as you promised, "I absolutely am."
"Fuck."
You laughed as you handed the bag to him and wrapped your arms around his neck. "Give me a minute to kiss you the way I wanted to earlier, and then we're having a picnic dinner."
Bradley started to respond with one eyebrow raised, but you didn't let him get a word out as your lips met his. He deepened the kiss immediately, and you sighed; this was how you always wanted him. You appreciated that he held back earlier, but right now, you wanted him all to yourself.
"Thank you for today," you murmured between kisses as his hand slid lower along your back. "You're the hero of Mira Mesa Elementary, and I wanted to treat you to dinner on behalf of my class."
His cheeks were a little rosy as he pulled away a bit more. "You don't have to thank me for anything. You know that. I'm happy to do anything you want."
"Stop," you whispered, burying your face against his neck. "A girl can only handle so much. Let's go eat dinner down on the beach, and maybe there will be an additional little something special for you."
You were tugging on his arm, fingers gripping his thick bicep, but he didn't budge an inch. "I'm in sweats and a tee shirt. Should I change?"
"Why?" you asked, still tugging. "You look hot."
His blush deepened. "But you're wearing your dress and my sweatshirt. And I was kind of interested in snuggling on the couch."
"Let's go," you repeated, and he took a few steps toward your car with the bag of food in his hand. "We can come back and snuggle on the couch later."
While he agreed, he didn't seem to want to let you go. His hand was on yours while you drove the few blocks to the beach, and he wrapped his arm around you as you pulled an oversized beach towel out of your trunk along with a blanket. 
"Baby, it'll get chilly as soon as the sun sets."
"I'll keep you warm," you promised, running your fingers along his bare arm before taking his hand. He was quiet as the two of you walked down from the parking lot to the sand, and when you looked up at him as the warm, orange light illuminated his face as the sun sank low in the sky, he seemed contemplative. "What's wrong?" you asked, heart skipping a beat as you stopped in front of him so he was looking at you.
Bradley's gaze was soft as he met your eyes. "Nothing's wrong. I'm with you." 
But even as the two of you ate dinner together, he pulled you snug next to his side like he was afraid you were going to go somewhere. You took a bite of the Pad Thai and then said, "I wish I thought to bring some Prosecco," but you only got a little grunt in response. "Bradley," you snapped, reaching for his chin and turning his head gently so he was facing you. "You weren't like this earlier during the field trip. You're acting strange. Do you want me to go home?"
"No," he replied with wide eyes, wrapping one big hand around your thigh and kissing your forehead. "I don't want you to go anywhere without me." With a sigh, he added, "I'm sorry. I just... got in my own head about us."
"Us?" you asked immediately, scrambling to try to figure out what you could have possibly done wrong. The whole day was perfect, and now you felt yourself trying to pull away from his grasp.
"No," he insisted once more as the air grew cooler. The sky was more dark blue than orange now, and Bradley was silent for a beat before he said, "Maverick... Captain Mitchell... you met him earlier..." When you nodded, he kissed your forehead and said, "He was my dad's friend. They flew together. Maverick knew him well."
Your boyfriend's parents had been gone for a long time. "Oh," you gasped. If you'd known that earlier, you'd have taken more time to get to know Captain Mitchell.
Before you could dwell on it too much, Bradley whispered, "I think about you all the time, Gorgeous. I think about fucking you on my couch and feeding you breakfast. I think about taking you back to Salvatore's for every special occasion. I think about your letters and your pretty face and diamond rings. And the future."
His words were warm and intentional, and you shivered even as he pulled you closer. "Bradley," you said so softly, you could barely hear yourself. "I think about all of that, too."
Some of the tension seemed to melt away from his body as you ran your fingers through his hair. His lips skimmed along yours as he said, "Maverick told me I reminded him of my dad today. And that you reminded him of my mom. This is all because he can tell how head over heels I am for you. Just like my parents were for each other."
Everything he said was too dreamy. When you tried to take a deep breath, it hitched in your throat. "I don't understand what the problem is, Bradley. I feel the same way about you."
His gaze was fixed on the water as he held you and said, "My dad left my mom and I alone. The last thing I ever want to do is leave you."
A smile found your lips as you wrapped your arms around his neck. "Is this why you're being weird and clingy at the same time?"
When he looked at you he laughed. "I guess. I'm sorry."
"Bradley," you whispered, kissing his mustache and reaching for the blanket to cover both of you. "I've spent months falling in love with you in spite of your job. Or maybe because of it. Or maybe just because there was no holding back. I've thought about the risks, and you are worth it. I'm sure your mom felt the same way about your dad."
He pulled you down on top of him, dinner forgotten, and kissed you with one heavy hand still on the back of your thigh. "As long as you've accepted the risks, Gorgeous." His fingers slid up a few inches as he added, "Today was incredibly fun for me, and I'm happy your kids had a good time. I'm already looking forward to visiting your school again if you want me there."
"Oh," you whispered, placing a soft kiss to his scars. "That reminds me. Career day is coming up in a few months. You'll definitely need to be there for that."
Bradley grunted and gave you a little smack on your rear end that made you gasp in delight. "See, you're telling me about this now, but I already heard about career day from Marty."
Your fingers on his bicep tightened as you tried not to moan. "I just got excited earlier," you whispered. "I promise I was going to tell you."
"Hmm... so Marty and the other aviators are more interesting than I am. I understand, Gorgeous."
His voice was teasing, and he seemed a lot more at ease now as that big hand gripped and grabbed at you under the blanket. When you shifted slightly, you could feel him through his gray sweatpants. He was a little eager, but so were you now. His occasional need to hear you reaffirm your feelings for him was something you'd always be happy to indulge.
"Will you let me prove to you that you're the most interesting? My very favorite Naval officer?"
"What do you have in mind?"
--------------------------
The first few stars were glittering to life in the sky as the horizon continued to darken from orange to purple to blue. Bradley lounged back on the oversized beach towel with one arm tucked behind his head and enjoyed the sight. It was beautiful. So was the sound of you softly gagging on his cock.
"God damn," he muttered, fingers stroking the back of your neck as he squeezed his eyes closed and focused on the feel of your mouth slowly gliding along his shaft until he was deep once again. The air was cool on his overheated skin, and the breeze was probably enough to keep anyone else from visiting this secluded stretch of beach while you treated him to your lips and tongue.
When you gagged again, he saw stars prettier than the ones in the sky, and he could feel your saliva drip down to his balls before you lapped at them as well. He half expected to see the front of his sweatpants all damp by the time you were done. He was really looking forward to it. And it wouldn't be much longer now as you sucked on his balls and pumped your fist around him nice and slow.
Your voice was light as air when you released him and playfully asked, "Do you believe you're my favorite?"
Bradley glanced down where he could see the outline of your body and his hard cock hanging out of his pants. "Baby, I would believe anything you told me right now," he muttered, delighting in your laughter.
"You're my favorite," you said before kissing his tip and sinking those pretty lips around him once again. Your grip was firm as you sucked, and it wasn't long before Bradley was grunting and trying not to grab you too tight with his fingers. 
You were giving him head on the beach, and it was so damn hot, but you were still his sweet girlfriend. He just wanted to make you happy, and when he came, you moaned in delight until he couldn't tell if his eyes were open or closed. Then your lips were on his, and he could taste both of you there. "You're my favorite," you repeated, reaching down to carefully pull his sweatpants up while he head spun.
He groaned and wrapped his arm around your waist. "If this was your ploy to get me to agree to career day, it definitely worked. But you know I would have said yes no matter what."
Your lips were on his ear as you laughed. "Can we go home and get warmed up in the shower?"
Home. You belonged there with him. He knew it. You knew it too, even if only subconsciously. "Yeah, let's go home."
On Friday, he woke up earlier than usual to make sure you were awake in time to get to work. He packed you a lunch, grimaced when he checked the traffic on his phone and said, "I'll pay for your gas."
"I don't need you to pay for my gas, Bradley!" you insisted.
One look at your pretty face had him shaking his head. "Traffic is a nightmare. What's it going to take to get you to come back here again tonight?" he asked, handing you a mug of coffee. "Because I honestly don't mind paying a little extra in gas money to make up for the fact that I bought a house in Coronado."
You bit your lip and then asked, "How do you not understand that being with you is going to be worth the drive?"
"Save your verdict for after you've actually driven through rush hour."
He was delighted when you returned right after work for the weekend. And Saturday morning, you slept in while Bradley went for a run with Nat. He kissed you goodbye and watched you roll over onto his pillow with a soft smile on your lips. Six miles in and he was getting antsy to get back to make you breakfast.
"Are you two coming to the bar tonight?" Nat asked, huffing as she tried to speak and run at the same time.
He grunted in response. You hadn't been to the Hard Deck yet, and he wasn't sure he felt like sharing you with everyone else this evening. "Maybe."
Nat rolled her eyes. "Just bring her. You've been MIA for weeks and weeks since you got back. You can stare longingly at her while other people are around for a few hours."
"I'll ask how she feels about it."
But he should have known you'd want to go as soon as he mentioned it to you in the shower after breakfast. "I didn't bring anything cute to wear," you complained with a little pout.
"Baby, you could wear one of my ratty old shirts with your jeans, and you'd be the cutest thing in the place."
A smile curved along your lips, and that's exactly what you ended up wearing. Your snug jeans only looked sexier on you when paired with one of his soft tee shirts from his college days, which you tied in a little knot at the hem. He could see a peek of your skin here and there as you finished getting ready that evening, and he couldn't keep his hands off you. When the two of you arrived at the Hard Deck, he knew he was going to have to keep you close by.
"What do you want to drink?" he asked, tucking his fingers around your waist as Jake Seresin himself eyed you up. "The only thing I can promise is that the wine here sucks compared to Salvatore's."
But you were oblivious as you looked around the interior of the bar as you caught a few more gazes. He didn't love these horny guys all checking you out like the piece of fresh meat you really were. "How about a beer then?" you asked, scanning everything that Penny had on tap and pointing to your favorite.
"Solid choice," he replied, ordering two from Jimmy. And then all too soon, you were the one pulling him toward the pool table and Natasha.
"Well, well, well," Jake drawled, setting down his empty bottle and tossing a dart repeatedly up into the air with his gaze glued on you. "What do we have here, Bradshaw?"
"This is my girlfriend," he replied immediately. "Don't get any ideas."
You cleared your throat, stuck out your hand, and told Jake your name. He reached for you with a smile and didn't let go. "You must be the teacher from the field trip the other day. I'm Jake. But if you'd prefer to use my call sign, it's Hungman. I mean Hangman. Looks like Baby on Board was right."
"Right about what?" Bradley asked, eyes darting to where Bob was blushing profusely with a pool cue in his hand.
Jake chuckled. "Nothing I can say in front of mixed company."
"Oh!" you said, pulling your hand free and pointing at Jake while you took a sip of your beer. Bradley felt the need to protect you, but you didn't really need him to at all as you smirked and said, "Hangman. Right. You're the guy with the dumb call sign. My students were still talking about it yesterday."
Bradley started laughing at the sour look on Jake's face. After that, you had some very pleasant conversations with Javy, Mickey and Reuben, even though he could see their eyes dip down to your chest on occasion. It wasn't really their fault that you were beautiful, so he let it slide while he played pool with Nat. Eventually you joined in with him, and you insisted on buying the next two beers plus another drink for his best friend.
"I'll be right back," you told him, playfully backing away toward the bar with a smile, and Bradley watched you the entire time you were gone.
"You are a mess," Nat informed him as if he didn't already know that.
He shook his head. "I just know the day is going to come when I'm not around to physically be with her. And you'll be the one inviting her out to the bar while I'm eating soggy cabbage rolls on an aircraft carrier. So I need to set the precedent now. She's with me, and all of these assholes we work with can keep their hands to themselves where she is concerned."
"You were never this up tight when you brought Vanessa here."
His ex's name always sounded startling now when it rattled around in his head. "She was mean," he said easily. "Nobody wanted to talk to her even though she was pretty." But Bradley honestly never did feel this way about her or anyone else before you. Watching you pay Jimmy with a smile on your face before turning and meeting his eyes was enough to send him walking halfway to meet you.
Bradley took one of the drinks from your hands and leaned down to give you a nice, long kiss with tongue. Was he marking his territory? Sure. Was he also letting you know he was ready to get you alone again whenever you wanted to leave? Absolutely. Was he also just such a mess he couldn't help but touch you? A hundred percent.
It wasn't long before you suggested calling it a night.
----------------------------
Bradley was deep inside you, one big hand pinning your wrists above your head on his pillow. His fingers were trailing down your skin as he fucked you a little harder, and you let him talk and ramble to his heart's content while he brought you closer to where you wanted to be.
"You're perfect," he crooned, hazy gaze focused on your face. "Tell me, Baby, please. I need to know." He kissed along your neck, tongue darting out to taste the sheen of sweat. "Please."
"What?" you gasped, barely able to talk at all as his fingers settled on your clit.
You thought maybe he gave up trying to communicate right now, but then he licked his lips and said, "Give me a date. Please. Give me a date when you're going to move in." But he was stroking you just right, and your only response was a gasp before you were chanting his name.
His lips settled on yours as you came for him, clenching around his cock until he spilled himself inside you. His kisses were rough before turning sweet, and soon he was softly teasing your lips as he muttered, "You gonna tell me?"
It took you a second to push through the fog as your orgasm tapered off, and you smiled. "I thought you weren't in a hurry. Just in love." His cheeks turned a pretty shade of pink as he ducked his head, but you'd already been giving it a lot of thought. When he started to shift, you whispered, "January twentieth."
He froze again and met your eyes. "Yeah? Seriously?"
"Seriously."
His hands were cupping your face while he stayed buried inside you. "Gorgeous, you just made my whole fucking day."
Within the hour, he had the date saved in his phone calendar, and you were on his lap on the couch eating popcorn. "We've got time, but I'll help you pack beforehand and move everything. Javy has a truck, so I'll make sure we can use that. You could always start moving some things before that if you wanted to."
You popped a kernel between his lips and asked, "You just really wanted a date to look forward to?"
"So bad," he replied with a grin. "I can't wait to have my professional spider hunter around all the time."
"You're ridiculous," you told him with a grin of your own. You yawned, exhausted in the early hours of Sunday morning. "I need some sleep or else I'll be dead on my feet at work this week. You need to show me that you can be well behaved and let me rest even after I've moved in with you."
"On it," he replied, dumping the remainder of the popcorn into his mouth before scooping you up and heading for the bathroom to get ready for bed.
--------------------------------
Bradley smiled as he ate some macaroni and cheese in the cafeteria later that week. He had two new dates saved in his phone calendar. The day you would be moving in with him and the date for career day at your school. He couldn't wait. He was admiring the calendar entries when his phone alerted him to a new email. It was oddly enough from your school account.
Dear Lieutenant Bradshaw,
We just wanted to reach out and thank you again for taking us on a tour of North Island. Our lessons about aviation were brought to life. It was the educational opportunity of a lifetime, and we also had so much fun on the field trip. Our classroom door is always open anytime you want to visit.
Sincerely,
Your nineteen pen pals
Immediately after he finished reading, he noticed he had another email. From your personal account this time.
Did you know there are just thirty-five days until I move to Coronado?
Attached was a photo of you holding up three fingers and five fingers in front of your naked tits, and Bradley almost dropped his phone. He could see everything, just like you probably intended, but he had to close out of the image as Maverick approached him with a frown.
"We need to talk."
Bradley's brow furrowed. "What's going on?"
The older man sighed and rubbed his forehead. "A call came in from Norfolk. Atlantic Fleet needs one more F/A-18 pilot for an assignment. Your name was mentioned."
"No," Bradley replied immediately as his stomach lurched. "Atlantic Fleet? Mav, please tell me you're joking."
"I'm not."
Bradley's head was swimming with concern. He'd only been in the Pacific Fleet for a few years, and he wasn't looking to go back to Virginia. Not even temporarily, but certainly not permanently. You were only with him because he was based out of San Diego. You told him yourself how scared you had been when you thought you were falling for a man who lived on the other side of the country.
"My name was mentioned?" he muttered. "Who else was mentioned?"
Maverick shook his head. "Nobody. They want you. I'd start thinking about getting your duffle out of the closet this weekend. I'll get your more information as soon as I can."
Bradley had more questions than answers, but he let the other man walk away without another word. When he unlocked his phone and saw the perfect photo of you, his heart clenched. Having answers to his questions would only make it harder to tell you what was about to happen.
---------------------------
But they love each other! Reverting back to full-time pen pals mode? Will that even work? Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls
PART 18
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joonsytip · 5 months ago
Text
Only for Love || Mingyu - Epilogue
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Pairings: Mingyu x Fem!Reader
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut, Husband!Mingyu, Cold Wife!Reader, Arranged Marriage au, Contract Marriage au, Divorce au
Synopsis: When an accidental discovery has your perception of happy married life crumbling down, you do what you think is the best for everyone involved. Naturally, your opinion of the best doesn't cater to your husband's. So what happens when things spiral out due to unforeseen events?
Warnings: divorce, reader is pregnant and having it hard, emotional baggage, tears and profanities, mentions of throwing up, morning sickness, lot of banter.
Word Count: 7.8k
[ Svt Masterlist ] [ Svt Flick - Fic Masterlist ]
Teaser | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Epilogue
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Mingyu didn't get a wink of sleep, neither did you. It's something given.
What's not given for him is the way you're waiting for him with the luggage by the door.
"No...", Mingyu says to himself, as he eyes the bags and then takes a look at your face. He then scurries off to the guestroom only to find all your belongings gone. He goes to the bedroom and same, the house has no traces of you left.
And once you leave, no one would be able to tell if you were ever here, not even Mingyu himself.
He comes back, devasted.
"Please, don't leave.", he pleads, his voice coming out in cracks, "Not when I have so many things to tell you, so much to confess."
You bite your tongue and while trying to maintain the poker facade, you say, "I'll sum it up for you. Our marriage is based on a contract between you and my uncle. And even after over 2 years of the marriage, you find it difficult to be with me because I'm..", you suck in a deep breath, "not Sora. I'm not like her."
Mingyu looks at you with tears in his eyes, wanting to retort everything you're saying but he knows nothing he says would make you believe him. After all, trust has been compromised.
"And I'll never be her, Mingyu.", you say, your voice giving out the dejection, "So I'm freeing you from this marriage. We'll get divorced. You can be with whoever you want. And I will lead my life as how it was supposed to be."
"How was your life supposed to be?", Mingyu asks, his heart thumping as he close the gap between you two.
"Alone.", you answer him, unwavering.
"God, no", he holds you gently, "You belong with me, Y/N. I known I have been dishonest with you when you had clearly warned me beforehand. And I know I've hurt you so much over the span of our marriage but please believe me when I say that I'd not do it with anyone else, it'll be always you."
His gaze tears the shield that you have guarded yourself with, your grip on the trolley loosens for a moment.
And before you give in, you brace yourself.
"We're done talking, Mingyu. I'll have my lawyer set a date with you and yours.", you say removing his hands, "As I said, you can have everything you want--"
"But all I want is you, Y/N."
Your heart beats erratically in your chest. Your senses start to behave abnormally and your mind almost discards the rationalities. But you know you couldn't afford all these, that for him to be well, you'd have to let go.
"Except me, anything you want.", you say in a strained voice, your hands itching to wipe those tears from his face, "I know you're ambitious so that's why I don't think our divorce would weigh much on you. If you respect and value the time we spent together, for the sake of those, divorce me. I beg you, I want nothing else."
And Mingyu stands exactly where you have left him. It's a been a week and he's miserable.
His parents are not in talking terms with him, the moment they knew about the contract which is leading to the divorce.
And Minhee, she's has been taking the worst hit. And now, she understands if you never want to see her again after what her brother has done. But doesn't mean, it'd hurt less.
Unlike her brother, she was not popular with people. Majority approached her just get a whimp of her brother and that's why she had trust issues, leading her to be cautious of people. She does have genuine friends she's close with but you, you are different.
Minhee admires you, proudly calls you her family and loves you because she has noticed it all. How you have accommodated yourself and been a part of the family. Not big with words but bigger with actions. And maybe Mingyu can be dumb but the entire family knows that you love him, it's so painfully obvious.
"Hey", a soft voice breaks her reverie. She turns to look and finds Soonyoung.
"I don't want to see you.", she tells him, "So leave."
Soonyoung sighs, "But you're upset and I can't see you like this--"
"Why do you care suddenly?", she glares at him, "Look, I don't like you anymore okay? I can't believe you all knew about that contract but didn't stop him. What kind of friends are you?"
Soonyoung just sits, head down and listens to her reparimend him. At least, he gets to see her.
"What do you want?", you ask, checking your watch. There's an unfamiliarity in your tone.
"Can you please reconsider and withdraw the petition?", Jeonghan asks politely.
"No.", you flatly deny.
He runs his hand through his hair in frustration, which is rare.
"Mingyu is not doing well, Y/N. He has shut out everyone.", he says, "That day, Sora took Mingyu with her to visit me because she thought I'd not meet her if she comes. And it was totally work, nothing else Y/N. Mingyu doesn't have feelings for Sora, he likes--"
You raise your palm up and Jeonghan shuts up. There's nothing much to say, not anymore. So you just give him an ultimatum before leaving.
The day comes fast and hits harder. Mingyu sits frozen with the pen in his hands, his vision dazed, mind blank. It's happening and it's a matter of time then you'd be denounced as husband and wife.
As you sit in front of him, you can't help but notice Mingyu's state. You can tell he's been having it hard, he looks lost. He hasn't spoken except when urged since he arrived, he seems like an entirely different person.
Mingyu can't bring himself to sign the papers. He can't bear to look at you. And since the universe have decided to bite him back with karma, he does it.
A single drop of tear wets the paper, just below the line where he signs his name.
The formalities are done and it's official. Though there's a cool off period both sides know that it's of no use.
Your lawyer leads the way out, solemnly announcing the outcome of the meeting.
"Y/N", Mingyu calls and you dismiss your lawyer waiting for him to catch up.
There's a devastatingly sad smile on his tear stained face and your breaks at the sight of him.
"So it's ends here.", Mingyu says trying to hide the quiver in his voice, "I'm sorry for everything, Y/N. I have been a failure and I can't do anything to fix it. But I wish you healing and a peaceful life ahead."
He quickly wipes the tears and continues hesitantly, "If ever my name comes to your mind, please contact me. I'd come if you want help in something minimal, I'd listen if you wanna curse me out. Be it anything, all you have to do is drop a text or call me and I'll come to you. We can't be friends but I'd like to just pretend."
You don't think you can hold your tears anymore so you let them fall. Mingyu is surprised and his hands almost touches your face in worry but he remembers that it's not his place anymore.
"Live well, Mingyu.", you tell him, "Take care of mom, dad--", rectifying it quickly, you continue, "aunt, uncle and Minhee. We all mistakes, make sure to learn from them and treat others rightfully."
Mingyu understands the weight behind your words. Times seems to have frozen as none of you make a move.
You take the initiative to break the reverie. Because even if Mingyu thinks it's the end but you know you'd have to see him again.
"The sunset is beautiful, isn't it?", you smile through your tears, looking up at the sky then back at him.
And just as you predicted, Mingyu doesn't get the meaning of your words because he's distracted and you're relieved.
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Your apartment still feels foreign. It shouldn't be as you've lived here for most of your life and now you are sitting alone, lost in the thoughts.
Whenever there is too much on your plate, you'd call your uncle. Just listening to his voice soothes you so you quickly fish out your phone. But just as your thumb hovers over the call button, tears stream down because you remember that you won't be able to hear his voice ever again.
You've started showing a little since the second trimester has started and you are thinking of ways to tell Mingyu, scared at wits remembering how everything went down everytime you've tried to let him know.
But you know you've to let Mingyu know about the baby and it has to be soon.
Stress is eating at you and nausea has become your best friend. Morning sickness loves you and you can barely eat any food without throwing out. Minghao has been attentive, trying his best to help you out but there's a limit to he can do.
You are not feeling particularly well today while you're at work. For some reason your chest feels like vacuuming out, your head spins a little.
You have been doing great at hiding the uneasiness until you're addressing the people about some requirements in the character design involving all the teams and your legs gives up. Your vision spars and suddenly your eyes shut, causing you to loose consciousness.
Minghao lurches forward, catching you in time saving you from the impact of fall. He doesn't waste any time picking you up and rushing to the hospital, himself being drained out in fear.
Soonyoung immediately follows and while he drives behind, he makes a bunch of calls.
The lights from the ceiling are blinding enough to cause irritation even if your eyes are closed. There are murmurs at the backdrop but they're low not quite reaching your ears. Your left hand feels heavy, you think there's a weight on your stomach.
You squeeze at whatever was enclosing your hand and a very familiar voice calls out your name. But you can't figure out who it is. There are repeatative calls but your eyes are so heavy that you're finding it difficult to open them.
You feel a touch on your cheek, a soothing rubbing of thumb on it and you're able to open your eyes finally.
And you came across his face. Eyes red, lashes wet and hurt etched on features. His eyes are fixated on your face.
"Mingyu", you say grabbing his hand, "Where am I?"
Mingyu sighs in relief and kisses your forehead, his lips lingering on your skin as he speaks, "You're in the hospital. How are you feeling?"
"What happened to me? Why am I feeling so tired and sleepy?", you ask, as you hold his face, rubbing your thumb against his cheek gently, "Take me home and hold me to sleep please."
Mingyu worries at your state but he knows that it's an after effect of concussion and you'll be back to normal after some time.
"Is the baby fine?", you ask with a quiver in your voice.
Mingyu's eyes water with tears again at the mention and he backs away for a moment wiping those. He takes deep breathes and returns by your side.
Gently, caressing your bump he answers, "The baby is fine."
"Don't tell uncle that I'm here, he'd be worried.", you say and his heart breaks.
He nods at you wordlessly, choking back his sobs.
There's a smile on your face, "I can't keep my eyes open."
"Rest well.", he says, stroking your head, "I'll be here when you wake up."
"How's she?", Minhee asks as soon as Mingyu steps out of the room.
"She just woke up.", he informs, "She's suffering from concussion. She was asking for her uncle."
Mingyu's steps stumble as he seats on a chair. When he received the call from Soonyoung, he rushed to the hospital only to see you lying unconscious on the hospital bed.
And on asking the doctor, the first thing he discovers is that you're four months along in pregnancy. As the timeline aligns, it kills him to belatedly know that you dealt with your uncle's death, the divorce all by yourself being pregnant.
"Why didn't she tell me?", Mingyu ponders out loud, tugging on his hair forcefully.
"Maybe she was waiting--", Junhui is cut off.
"She had tried to tell you three times in exact.", Minghao pitches in, his voice stern and accusatory, "The first time, at the office event but you decided that going somewhere with ex-girlfriend was more important."
"You should tone it down. It's not what you're thinking.", Jeonghan chimes in his friend's defence.
"Oh I'm not talking to you.", Minghao glares at him, "And I know what is what and not."
His gaze directs back at Mingyu, "The second time was when she returned home only to find you bitching about her to these guys over here.", he gestures at group standing scattered in the area, "She was nervous about how to crack the news to you, that was the only reason she returned."
Mingyu sits frozen in place as Minghao hammers the nail on his heart one by one.
The final blow punctuates brutal and hard, when Minghao says, "The third time was", he pauses for a moment before continuing, "The day uncle died. If you remember, she had asked you come home earlier, it was because she wanted to tell about the pregnancy."
"She must have been so scared. It must have been so hard for her.", Minhee whispers, choking on tears, "We have been so ignorant. We don't deserve her."
Soonyoung runs to her side but Minhee steps away from him, drawing a line.
Minghao nods solemnly, "Even after that she tried but her mind succumbed to the thought that something bad would happen again if she reveals about the pregnancy. She is indeed scared."
Hansol walks up to him and pleads, "Tell us if there's anything we could do. I don't care, be it anything, please."
Minghao scoffs, "You should have done something when your friend was going to marry her because of a contract which she wasn't even aware about.", he jabs his finger at his chest, "you should have knocked senses into your stupid friend when he chose his ex-girlfriend.", another jab, "you should have fought back when he was bitching about his own wife."
He sweeps his sharp gaze across the faces, "You could have done a lot of significant things but you chose not to and now there's nothing left to salvage."
"You're right.", Seokmin resorts to resignation, "We, as a bunch are awful. All of us."
Minghao is all riled up with pent up frustration of months bouncing off, he walks over to Mingyu grabbing his collar and pulling him up on his feet. When others try to pull them apart, Mingyu shakes his head, a sign asking them not to interfere. His head bowed down throughout.
His voice drips with venom when Minghao says, "How could you say that she didn't change? How could you not know how bad her morning sickness is? Why did she have to deal with everything and suffer alone while you lived with her?"
Minghao has so much to say, so much to let Mingyu know but he cannot. He doesn't have the right to do so.
He grabs the collar tighter, with much force, enough to draw lines of abrasion on the later's neck, "Don't think she's alone. She has me, she'll always have me. And you must have heard the rumours going around since you have a spy at our office.", he says looking at Soonyoung and back at him, "I'll tell you the truth. I love Y/N."
All pair of eyes widen at the declaration, even Mingyu's. Minghao's eyes are teary as he speaks his heart out, "I will always love her. Even if she never reciprocates, my feelings for her won't change."
Mingyu's parents who have been listening to the conversation, without announcing their presence decide not to interfere.
Later when you woke up, you didn't let anyone else meet you apart from Minghao who also completes the formalities for your discharge.
But when Mingyu almost barges in, you tell him to visit your apartment the next day if wants to talk. He simply obliges.
"I have tried to tell you about the pregnancy--"
Mingyu shakes his head, he doesn't meet your gaze, "I know now and that's what matters."
You scrutinize and everything about him screams that he is not doing well. Physically evident, mentally also as his body language gives it out.
"This wasn't planned and I'm keeping it so if you don't want to be a part of it, this will be the last time we're meeting--"
You don't get to finish the sentence as Mingyu lunges forward and kneels at your feet.
"I was a bad husband and I understand if you don't have any trust left in me. But we made it, Y/N. Of course I'll be there through the rest of the pregnancy and after that. We'll raise the baby, our baby.", he tries to convey his sincerity through his words, "I failed to be a good husband but I promise I'll try to be a good father."
"I'm sorry, you had to find out this way.", you say, your hands finding its way to wipe the tears that stained his cheeks.
You have been awfully swayed, your emotions are a mess and you can't mask your real emotions anymore. Pregnancy hormones are being tough on you and what you're scared the most about is letting yourself loose in Mingyu's presence. Something you cannot afford.
Mingyu is also quick to catch the changes in your demeanor. He knows you're being vulnerable and you'll be trying your best to conceal it but he makes a promise to himself that he'll protect you, take care of you. Even if you push him away, he won't scurry away this time.
Another episode of Mingyu's crying happens when you show him the sonograms from all the previous checkups and he carefully pockets the copies you give him, promising to accompany you for the checkups, memorizing the dates by heart from your calendar.
"What have you been eating?", he asks, padding into the kitchen. You follow him.
Concern grasps at him on hearing that you cook for yourself now and Minghao sometimes bring in his cooked food but you throw up more than you can eat. You tell him that you've been having trouble sleeping which caused the fatigue.
"I'll cook for you from now on.", he says determined.
"I appreciate it but you don't have to do it. It'll be a hassle--"
Mingyu dismisses you as he scans through the kitchen and makes the notes of the groceries that needed restocking, "My hassle, I'll handle it. Anyway, I used to cook for us."
"That's what.", you interject, "You used to. We're divorced now."
Mingyu freezes at the mention of divorce but quickly regains his composure, "I'm doing this for our baby. You can't tell me otherwise, I'm sorry but expect to see me a lot more from now on. And though I know it would make no sense to you but you can rely me."
You don't respond to that rather making a lame excuse, walking back to the bedroom.
Since then, it's been a rollercoaster ride for the both of you.
Whenever you try to draw a line, Mingyu erases it before it could even take a prominent shape.
"No, you don't have to drive me to work everyday.", you say sternly, "I can drive and if not Minghao can take me with him. He does that sometimes."
It's wrong of him to get jealous but when has the heart ever sided with him, "Minghao lives in the opposite direction, Y/N. It'll save all of us time and effort if you let me drive you."
"You also live in the opposite direction.", you snide, "Don't try to outsmart me."
Mingyu smiles sheepishly, "Anyways, I have to drop by to give you the lunchboxes. Now on, I'll just come early and cook here itself. My office starts later than yours so it's fine."
And no matter what you couldn't win over him. Hence, he now knows the passcode of your apartment.
"You're not allowed to barge in anytime without my permission. Always drop a text if you're coming. Don't misuse the privilege.", came your strict instruction with those 4 digits.
As another month passes by, your cravings start to get weirder. The urges always are to have something which you think no sane person would ever think about eating. And the timings, well random, no patterns.
Mingyu's heart drops when he's cooking one morning and you emerge from your room with a big patch pasted on your forehead.
He rushes to your side but you pretend to not notice him, roaming around the house aimlessly. And after a lot of tailing, Mingyu finally corners you.
The proximity almost makes you go berserk. His smell overpowers you causing you to nudge him to widen the gap.
"Lately, my cravings have been you know....", you trail off embarrassed, "It always hits at dawn hours."
Mingyu listens to you with utmost attention.
"I was craving candied pickles and I didn't have them at home so I went to the convenience store at 4 am."
You hush him when Mingyu opens his mouth, wide eyed, jaw dropped.
"I couldn't find the car keys and it was only there blocks down so I walked there and on the way back, I bumped onto a pole. It was dark, I missed it.", you whine rubbing your face in embarrassment and wincing when you accidentally rub on the cut.
It's a reminder to Mingyu of how you have been having it difficult and a string of regrets  making him ponder that if the divorce didn't happen he could have been doing all of it for you, without having asked to.
He grabs your face, making you look at him, "From next time onwards, please call me, no matter what time. I'll bring you what you're craving. It's not safe alone out there, more when you're pregnant."
And he knows that even though you'd agree on his face but you'd never bother him out at odd timings. Scratch that, he wants you to contact him even for the simplest things but you don't. Every time his phone pops up a notification he wishes that it's you. But that never happens.
So one night when your cravings got to your head and you decided to make a quick round to the store, your heart leaped out of the chest on opening the door.
It's Mingyu, sitting by the threshold, well sleeping against the door. As the door opened his body fell inside, waking him up as the result of the impact.
You quickly stand him up on his feet and take him inside.
"What are you doing here?", you ask him flabbergasted, "Why were you sleeping at the door when you know the passcode?"
Mingyu, still groggy, answers, "You told me to not enter your house without informing you. And I didn't want you to go out alone."
Your heart twinges at his words. You should be having emotional turmoil but something unexpected is happening and you absolutely hate it. The cravings for food have suddenly subsided and now you're craving for something else.
Rather someone else. You're suddenly craving for your ex-husband.
How can he look so tempting, wearing just a simple t-shirt and trackpant while being sleepy. Blame it on the hormones and those r-rated scenes in the movie that you watched this afternoon.
"Don't pull something like this again.", you say, rubbing your neck, "Just punch the code and get in, anytime."
And Mingyu is left confused when you maneuver him to the other room asking him to sleep there before rushing into your bedroom because another moment he is in your vicinity, your control would snap.
Domesticity comes handy with Mingyu. He is the kind of person who could effortlessly blend into your life under any circumstances.
So one day when you stand oogling your shoes wrack with doe eyes and curled down lips, Mingyu comes searching for you.
"What did those shoes do so bad to make you upset?", he asks with a hint of humour in his voice.
You huff before craning your neck to look at him. You pull him beside and point at the topmost shelf saying, "Those are my favourite pair of stilettoes, it's been so long I've worn them. And that pair of ruby scarpin, I can hear them calling my name."
Mingyu knows about your admiration of heels which explains the huge collection you've accumulated. Staying with you, has also made him accustomed to the clacking of heels whenever you walked swiftly wearing them.
So he understands that pregnancy doesn't actually leverage you from wearing heels, but you don't wear them just to maintain safety and avoid prolonged effects.
He takes your hands with a mischievous smile, "Wanna experience the feeling of wearing them?"
"You know I can't."
He hushes you, pulling you closer. He gestures you to slip out of the sliders and straightens himself, "Hop on my feet."
You look at him confused, "You'll get hurt, plus even if I try my belly won't allow me to do so."
"Just trust me, okay?", Mingyu says coaxing you and you do give in.
As you can't see the ground beneath your belly, Mingyu guides you and as soon as your feet are on his, he adjusts them making sure that both of your heels are in the air. Once making sure of the position, he places your hands on his shoulders and secures his tightly around your waist.
He starts walking around the house with you.
"See, same same.", he grins, pecking your forehead.
You laugh, lolling your head back, "Getting creative now, are we Mr. Kim? I'll give you points for the height."
Mingyu swears that he'd walk you this all the time, that your feet won't touch the ground even for a second if you want.
One day, he accidentally discovers that phoenix_726 is actually you when he wanted to play a game but it's been so long that he has forgotten his credentials so he decides to play using your account.
"I thought you're a man!"
"I used voice modulator with my headset because creeps started hitting on me as soon as they I'm a female."
"I can't believe, we've talking to each other, played along so long without knowing the real identity."
"Remember, I'm a much better player than you, Kim Mingyu."
"You wish, Y/N. I'm obviously better."
That debate never ended.
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This isn't supposed to happen. You stand by the kitchen counter, watching a very familiar scene unfold in front of you.
"I can see the gears turning, you know?", Minghao says as he stands beside you.
"How did I agree upon this?", you sigh, "What's wrong with me, this isn't supposed to happen."
His features soften, "Because though you were able to hide your emotions previously, now you couldn't do that anymore. They are here because you've missed them, it's because you love them and want to spend time with them."
You know he's speaking the truth. And your eyes tear as the words hit you. Minghao pats your back when he sees you wiping your eyes frantically hoping for no one to see you like this.
"Thanks for letting us meet you.", Minhee smiles as you both sit and enjoy the company, "I missed you."
"Me too, Minhee.", you look at her, returning that smile. You turn only to find Junhui humouring Minghao, the latter actually smiling at the antics which is rare. Seokmin and Jeonghan are seemingly scolding Soonyoung. And Hansol is talking about something real serious with Mingyu's parents.
And your breath hitches when your gaze locks with Mingyu, he has been looking at you the whole time.
"He misses you the most.", Minhee says, "But he's been happy now, keeps yapping about how he gets to see you everyday. Goes on for hours about how much more beautiful you've gotten, the pregnancy looks great on you. Cries every time, he realises you two aren't together and it's because of him."
You turn back to look at her, shaking your head. It's overwhelming.
You had a good time. Minghao gained new friends and Mingyu stayed back while everyone else left. It's because he knows you too well. He has noticed you caressing your protruding belly more than usual.
"It's just the usual spasms.", you tell him when he asks repeatedly, "Maybe because I moved around way too much today."
"I'm taking you to the doctor, tomorrow.", Mingyu says, "No objections. But for now, what can I do to make you feel better?"
"There's nothing to do, Mingyu. It'll go away."
Mingyu nods just to go back and hug you from behind. You freeze at the sudden action. His hands snake down from your waist as he gently tries to hold up the weight of your belly. And it's somehow soothing. He dips his nose on your nape to inhale your scent and you subconsciously lean back on him.
That night when you have trouble sleeping again, Mingyu spends it reading the books on parenting devotedly until you fall asleep in his arms, on the couch. But you wake up on the bed the next morning.
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"What does this mean, anyone knows?", Soonyoung asks as the guys hang out.
Mingyu is involuntarily present as Minhee kicks him out of your apartment, declaring girls day. He has been sulking since then.
"The sunset is beautiful, isn't it?", Soonyoung adds, "This."
The phrase rings in Mingyu's ear as he tries to figure out its familiarity.
"Who said that to you?", Seokmin asks amused.
Soonyoung gulps, he can't reveal that Minhee had said it to him so he brushes it off.
Seokmin cocks his brows but tells nonetheless, "When someone says this, it's a way of them telling you that they love you, but they're letting you go."
Soonyoung freezes and so does Mingyu.
Seokmin looks at both of them lost while Hansol quickly catches on.
"By any chance, did Y/N say that to you?, Hansol asks and before Mingyu could answer Jeonghan stirs up.
"She did.", he confirms, "On the day they got divorced. I was there and heard it as well. Thought it was unusual of her to say something like that given the situation. But it makes sense now."
Junhui gasps, "Oh my god", he slaps his hand covering his mouth in shock, "She loves you, goddamn it. She loves you!"
Mingyu sits frozen. His mind is empty, no thoughts at all.
"Min?", Seokmin tries to shake his friend out of the trance.
"Gyu", Jeonghan calls calmly, "There's something I have been meaning to ask you for some time."
And when he does so, Mingyu does show a minimal movement. And of a sudden his empty mind from before starts filling up with all sorts of thoughts. His head and heart teams up to concierge him.
Mingyu looks at him robotically.
"You had kept the contract papers in the locker right? Did you even tell Y/N the passcode?", he asks.
Mingyu shakes his head, "No. She doesn't know."
"Then how did she get the papers? Did you check the locker again?", Hansol asks further.
"All she said was that she got the papers from my office. And while in the hassle, it didn't occur in my mind to check the locker again.", Mingyu answers.
"If my hunch is right, then I'm guessing it's a lie.", Jeonghan says, "I think she already knew about the contract, sometime after the marriage."
"How did she know? Her uncle never wanted her to know so he wouldn't tell her.", Junhui asks, "And even if she knew then why did she use it to get a divorce?"
"Only Y/N has the answer to these questions.", Jeonghan says, "Gyu, just go and check the locker and if you find your copy of the contract papers then just go and confront her. I'm sure she has her reasons so know them and see if there's a chance of reconciliation."
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You notice that Mingyu has been acting quite out of character for the past few days. He seems like lost in thought. There's something different about the way he looks at you now.
The day before when you both went out to buy clothes and stuff for the baby, unlike other times he remained absent minded. You chose not to bother him.
But as the pregnancy progressed towards the end of the last trimester, it has been giving you one kind of hell. You are pretty much lost without Mingyu, feeling like a liability who's useless without him. Your emotions are a mess and you're always tired.
Mingyu wishes he could do anything to soothe your pain. He cries in the bathroom at nights when he hears your groans and sees those tears streaming down your eyes. There's another turmoil that's whirlwinding inside him, he has so many questions he wants answer of but he couldn't, just didn't wanna cause of any more of stress.
After a lot of negotiation and convincing, Mingyu now gets to hold you to sleep. His warmth visibly helps you to sleep better. What's bothering him is how you tremble in your sleep at night, there's always some incoherent murmuring before you are crying which prompts him to wake you up in the middle of night. And no matter how many times he asks, you never utter words about those reoccurring nightmares.
One night when Mingyu instinctively wakes up just to check on you, he finds you looking at him. His heart drops when he finds you sobbing.
"Gyu", you caress his cheeks, "there's something I want to tell you."
Mingyu holds your hand that lays on his face, giving a nod.
You lean in, faces merely an inch apart, "I love you."
You feel him go stiff under your touch. But he doesn't look at you as if you've grown another head rather there's calamity in his features.
"I'd have regretted if I didn't say it to you.", you admit, "There's a favour I want from you."
"What is it?"
"If there's a situation comes while I give birth", you voice quivers, "where you could save either me or the baby. Choose to save the baby, please."
Mingyu can't believe what he's hearing. He can't fathom loosing either of you.
"Where is this coming from?", he croaks as his hand ascends to protectively rub your belly.
"I have been dreaming of banshee, everynight. It signifies that someone would die in the family. I don't have anyone else from the baby so please promise me you'll protect our baby."
Mingyu pulls you closer, trying to keep his tears at bay, "Nothing such will happen. You both will be safe and healthy. I'll protect you both."
There's a moment of silence before Mingyu decides to speak up, "I found the copies of the contract in the locker. You never got those in hand. Since when did you know about it and why did you lie?"
You knew he was bound to find out someday so you decide to come clean because it's suffocating to keep everything within yourself for such a long time.
"That was the copy uncle had. I found out about the contract after a year since we got married. Came across the papers accidentally in uncle's office while I was visiting and confronted uncle. He confessed everything and I felt so betrayed.", you look up at him, "But I couldn't even think about leaving you. That's when I realised that I had fallen in love with you."
You press your finger on his lips when Mingyu tries to speak.
"But I also knew that you weren't over Sora, your social media still had all your pictures with her. It made me think if we should go through this marriage. My fault, I just couldn't let you go, I wanted to believe that you'd eventually come to me. Can you blame me though? You are my first love, of course I was being stupid and pathetic."
You laugh through your tears and it cracks his heart. Mingyu is rendered speechless by now.
"Then I decided to forget about everything because I thought we were making progress. Well, atleast I thought that we're happily married, alongside hoping that you'd fall for me. More confident because the pregnancy came along. It wouldn't be really hard to develop feelings for the mother of your child right? That's what I pondered over every night. But then a string of incidents happened."
Your voice tones down flat, the sadness returning in it, "When Sora came back, I knew you were just helping her. But I was just afraid because I can fight all the people who want you but I can't fight that one person whom you want. Sora was your first love after all."
You shift, creating a tiny space between you and him, "I wasn't mad at you when I heard you saying those things about me to the guys. Your mind was clouded, your first love had returned, now wanting you back where on the contrary you were married to someone whom you didn't love. I know it all came out because you knew you'd never fall in love with me and it's because I wasn't exactly the wife material. You couldn't think of ending the marriage because a lot was at stakes, yes, the contract, it ends with the end of the marriage."
"But still I chose to be selfish because of the baby and thought of working our marriage. Then my uncle died.", you shudder, recoiling, "And that was the last straw or you can say the indication I needed. I realised that I'm cursed. People around me or associated with me keep dying. So it's better to cut off the ties. I brought up the divorce using the contract papers because that was only way to protect you. Losing you as a husband is far better than losing you entirely."
Mingyu exhales sharply. If he felt like a jerk before, he feels absolutely trash after your confession. The man who had always taken pride in himself for being perceptive and empathetic, termed as their ideal type by many has his pride crumbled down, been to put to place.
He's simply a buffoon who couldn't even understand his wife. Just because you are not verbal, doesn't mean that you don't care. You cared more than anyone else, selfless enough to let go just to protect your love.
In a world where all these people think love's for show, you are the type to die for your beloved in secret.
"Mingyu", your voice pulls him out of the reverie. Mingyu thinks you've enchanted him, otherwise how could it make sense that you're glowing under the moonlight that's peeking in through the windows. Your smile melts him into a puddle, you're looking so divine.
When his gaze locks on yours, you say, "Stop feeling bad. It's not your fault, feelings can't be controlled. And people do go through unhappy marriages and opt for separation. It's quite normal. Also, you don't have to go beyond your capacity to accomodate me. I know you feel and are responsible for the baby but it's okay. Co-parenting is surely difficult but we will make it work. Don't miss out on love and life because you feel guilty towards your ex-wife. I'll be fine."
Mingyu has enough. He gently pushes you on your back and suddenly grabs both of your hands and pins them above your head. He hovers over you, careful of your belly and says, "You're doing awfully bad for someone who has such great perceptive skills."
Then he proceeds to rest his forehead onto yours. Your eyes widen and you try to free your hands but your strength is nothing as compared to his.
"Please, please kiss me or I'll go insane.", Mingyu whispers against your lips, freeing your hands.
"We shouldn't be doing this.", comes your meek response.
"And what if I say that I love you?", Mingyu nudges your nose with his, kissing your chin.
"Don't say something you'd regret later.", you say inhaling sharply.
"I'd regret if I don't confess now. I have already made a lot of mistakes, I can't afford to make any more."
He kisses your forehead, "I admire you in all the aspects. The way you're managing work and life while carrying a life inside you, amazes me."
Kissing on top of your eyes, he says, "I know you're independent and efficient but you can lean on me when things get rough."
He smiles as he kisses your cheeks, "You're so beautiful. You were a different kind of beautiful before the pregnancy, your beauty is unfathomable now and you will still be aphrodisiac post pregnancy."
Another kiss on your nose, "You're gaming skills are better than mine. But we conquer more when we're teaming up. So please take me in. I promise I won't let you down."
"I love you.", you shudder when his lips ghost over yours, "And I'm not confessing on just some whim or impulse. I mean it and I'll do anything to earn your trust. Even if it takes the lifetime I'll spend it making up to you."
He then waits patiently.
"I'm not responsible for my actions, the hormones are making me do this.", you anmounce before closing the gap.
Mingyu holds your face, kissing you slow and deep. Smiles when he feels your hand puckering on his shirt. Doesn't pull away until you're tapping on his arms for a breather. Latches back onto your lips after a second because he has been craving them so bad and now that he got the taste, he can't get enough.
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The venue for the wedding is decorated beautifully, the lightings and flowers are complimenting each other in the best way.
You smile, sitting quietly as you resort to watching from a distance. The flute of champagne remains untouched.
Mingyu looked great when he walked to the altar. He looks beautiful on the stage. Seeing him donning the suit once again reminded you of your wedding. What if your marriage worked out?
Sora looks beautiful as well. Given, that she's the bride, all eyes are on her.
It's time to exchange vows, the priest announces. You don't remember all the vows you read during your wedding but you surely have some of them memorized. You wonder if they'll read the vows of similar wordings.
As the ceremony ends, your eyes move back and forth, studying the crowd when you feel the seat beside you being taken.
"Your presence on the stage was quite captivating.", you say boringly, "Someone could have mistaken you as the groom."
Mingyu laughs, "Actually I do want to get married but the woman I'm pursuing doesn't seem much interested."
You roll your eyes, "Then pursue someone else."
Though you don't look at him, you'd clearly sense the pout on his face, "But she's the love of my live and the mother of our son."
Your lips threaten to break into a smile. It's been over a year since you gave birth to Minjae, your son.
"Minhee had called.", you tell him, "She told that she'll be keeping Jae for another day, so no need to drop by her house."
Mingyu nods, "Minhee never lets him go easily. Jae seems to be fond of his aunt too. I'm sure Jae is perched on Soonyoung now."
You snort, "That's a given. I need your help on choosing the engagement gift for Minhee and Soonyoung. Hao will also join. When are you free?"
"For you, I'm always free.", Mingyu gives you a flirtatious smile, "Can Hao not come with us, I'll help him out separately."
"Let me go and congratulate Sora and Jungin quickly. We can leave after that.", you sigh at his antics and get on your feet, walking towards the newlyweds.
Sora, tired of her poor choices, sought out to her parents for arrange marriage and that's how she met Jungin and dated him for a while before tying the knot. You weren't exactly sure of attending your ex-husband's ex's wedding but Sora made you promise her and so you somehow ended up at the ceremony while Minhee took care of your son.
Not much has changed over the year. After your son's birth, Mingyu has become brazzen. He has become an absolute loser in love. And that loser has been courting you since then. You're always on your toes when around him because you have no idea what he'll pull. He is unofficially cohabitating with you in the name of parenting. You know better, even if Minjae grows up overnight and moves out, Mingyu would still not stop showing at your door with a bouquet in one hand and that damn smile.
You are unbothered when instead of dropping you off and leaving, Mingyu follows you into the apartment.
"Jae is not even here so what are you doing here?", you ask and take off your sandal.
And as you take another step, you're suddenly swept off your feet. You're not even surprised, your reflexes have grown immune. Mingyu effortlessly carries you to the bedroom and drops you on the bed, drops the blazer on the floor before joining you.
"I don't know about you but I need to change, can't sleep in this dress."
You whine when his grip around your hips tightens.
There's a goofy grin on his face, "I love you so much that my heart might explode someday. Thanks for giving birth to our son and for raising him with me. Thanks for being there for my sister and scaling that Soonyoung when he was confused about his feelings and being an absolute idiot. I like how happy both of them look together. Though you don't owe anything but I'm grateful as you always make sure to attend my parents' anniversary or birthdays and help them out when I can't. Thanks for being a great companion to my friends even after knowing how intolerable they can be."
You squint your eyes at him, already catching on.
Mingyu sits up and fishes out the very familiar velvety box.
He takes out the ring and asks, "Will you marry me?"
"No.", you say and get up, beelining into the bathroom to to get changed.
Mingyu smiles as he watches you. Here goes his 156th attempt of randomly proposing you and you rejecting him.
As Mingyu too gets changed and plops onto the bed, he whispers in your ear pulling you close to his body, "You know right, I won't stop asking you to marry me until you agree or find someone else which I pray for to never happen."
"What if I never say 'yes'?", you ask sleepily, feeling his lips giving feather kisses on your neck.
"I promised to wait a lifetime for you.", Mingyu answers in a heartbeat.
You drift off to sleep and Mingyu remembers something you had said a month or two ago as a part of your late night sleepy rambles.
"I'll marry you, after Jae turns three. I want him to be the flower boy at our wedding."
He still feels giddy, whenever he remembers your words. He doesn't know if he should account for something you said subconsciously, he's not sure if you are yourself aware of these words either. But what matters, what gives him hope is that deep inside your heart you've left him space.
So even if you agree to one of his random proposals, he'll prepare a grand proposal for you just before Jae's third birthday and will marry you right after his son turns three if you say yes.
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Mingyu has planned out everything, he'd make Jae walk you down the aisle along with him. Though he's not sure if his heart will be able to handle such a sight. Marrying the love of his life in the presence of his family and friends, what else he could ask for.
Because in the end, everything is worth only for love.
→ Do not copy, re-post, translate, or share any of my works on other platforms! All stories are copyrighted, joonsytip.
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violet-butterflies · 1 year ago
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❥︎ yandere! Dilf
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❥︎ Warnings ! ☞︎︎︎ drugging, stalking, delusional, doing things without consent ( male yandere! oc x female reader ) Click to see part 2 !
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It was a sunny afternoon when yandere! dilf finally finished unloading his and his son's stuff into their new home. Due to work and terrible memories from his past marriage, he moved into a different town with his son to start a new life. He was just beginning to unpack everything when someone knocked on his door.
"Hi! I'm your neighbor! I noticed that you were spending the whole day just unloading stuff so I decided to make you and your son some lemonade!"
The voice came from a woman who had a jug of lemonade on a tray with a couple of glass cups to pour the citrus drink into. Yandere! dilf couldn't help but smile at the offer as his muscular hands take the tray from your hands as he sent a pearly white smile their way.
"Thanks! I really appreciate it. I'm yandere! dilf by the way," he introduced himself while his son hides behind his leg "and this is my son."
"I'm (y/n)! Well then, I'll see you around neighbor!" (y/n) then disappeared back into their house which was right beside his. At first, yandere! dilf thought that he liked them because of their kind gift but it was only going to escalate from there.
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It really surprised yandere! dilf a few days when he met (y/n) again only in the most unexpected place. He was picking his son up from kindergarten when he realized that you were there, playing with his son.
"(y/n)? What are you doing here?"
"Oh! This is really such a coincidence! I happen to be your son's kindergarten teacher!" she explained with a bright smile on her face as his son came rushing to hug him.
"I was only playing with him since all the kids left already and I didn't want him to be alone for too long"
Yandere! dilf felt his cheeks heat up in embarrassment.
"I'm really sorry about that. I've just been swamped with work and before I knew it, I was 2 hours late to pick him up."
You sent the muscular man a sympathetic smile.
"No, I completely understand... Does this mean that he's with babysitters most of the time?"
"That's what My plan is but well... it seems like I'm finding difficulty finding any babysitters in this neighborhood"
"If you'd like, I can babysit your son on the weekends? I happen to need some extra money but, don't worry, I won't charge a crazy amount. We're neighbors after all," she offered.
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Ever since (y/n) offered yandere! dilf to be his son's babysitter, he only began seeing more and more of you inside his house. Yandere! dilf only expected you to take care of his son but you always seemed to go above and beyond. Sometimes, if the house was messy you'd try to clean it as best you could. Or maybe when you knew that he'll be home late, you'd prepare a simple dinner for both his son and him.
"Don't worry about it! Being a single parent must be really hard so I'll try to help you as best as I can!" That was always the kind of answer you would give when yandere! dilf feels bad for having you do all the housework.
Slowly though, yandere! dilf can't help but feel like (y/n) was acting just like a stay-at-home wife for him and he liked it. He can't help but daydream of situations where you were actually his wife. Situations where he was sharing a bed with you or taking you out on dates or sometimes to the extent of either their marriage or what their future children would look like.
Yandere! dilf might not look like it but, he was completely smitten. He was scared however of you finding out that he had a fat massive crush on you since he was at least 7 years older than you. This crush caused him to be obsessive and overprotective of you.
"What if she finds someone better? What if she is seeing someone?" Those were the questions that always made him have a small panic attack. He can't afford to lose someone so perfect; someone, who proved herself to be the perfect wife for him.
So, yandere! dilf would set up cameras in his house and ask you to babysit all the time. This would mean that he could always see you playing with his son through his phone and it always makes his heart swell with joy. He loved seeing how well you were getting along with the most precious little human in his world which only boosts the idea of how you were the only perfect person to be his son's mother and his wife. Not only that, but to take it one step further, he loved to buy you some treats or drinks when he gets back from work. The only catch is that they were drugged so you'd always end up falling asleep in yandere! dilf's house. (Y/n) never found it too odd though since you always connected it to you being too exhausted by playing with yandere! dilf's son all day.
(Y/n) falling asleep in his house was a big win for yandere! dilf too. The drugs that he used would make (y/n) fall into such a deep sleep it would actually be impossible to wake you up. This would mean that he can take as many pictures as he can and make you sleep on the bed with him before he has to move you to a spare room before you wake up to avoid suspicion. He loves it when he gets to snuggle your smaller body on his bed; a bigger plus if his son decides to join in. It was as if you three were already a picture-perfect family that yandere!dilf always dreamed of. His phone gallery is now filled to the brim with pictures of his son and you. His phone wallpaper is (y/n), there was a group picture of (y/n), his son and him set as his computer wallpaper, and there was a picture of (y/n) and his son in his wallet; acting like the perfect family he always dreamed of.
"Oh, good morning (y/n)! You fell asleep here again. Don't worry about it though! Here I made us all breakfast!"
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radiocrypt-id · 10 months ago
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The bad kids haven't really looked too closely at the Rat Grinders (meta wise I know it's a commentary on different play styles and how shitty xp farming is and how op players/parties can become by doing the bare minimum if they put in the time while everyone else plays the damn game) but I find the split perspective problems absolutely fascinating. I can't wait for the Bad Kids to look at the Rat Grinders with envy and anger that the Rat Grinders got to live a normal highschool life without all this insane danger and experience being a teenager without it being the end of the world for them. Right now they just hate the Rat Grinders energy and are matching it back (which is a very high school thing to do. To have beef with a whole other group of kids and not even know why but you'll die on this hill because they started shit first)
Because to the Rat Grinders, from a purely outside perspective, the Bad Kids are fucking monarchs of the school, right? They skipped classes, ran around town, fought people, got arrested, hung out with a big devil? Every new staff member came at their recommendation? One of them has both her dads working at the school?? The destroyed school property, got teachers killed, straight murdered the coach? These fucking kids run around and are apparently scott-free? because the principal liked their chaos enough to let it go and help them avoid the police? To the Rat Grinders, the Bad Kids are untouchable. They're exempt from the law. They're liars, cheats and need to be humbled. It's unfair. From everyone elses perspective, it really does look like the Bad Kids have been given crazy favourtism.
Meanwhile, all of the Bad Kids have died at least once. They've been irreparably changed and are in a constant state of fight or flight. They assume everything is dangerous and anyone might be an enemy because for two goddamn years that was the exact case! They couldn't trust any adult first year! Literally anyone could have been infected with Kalina second year! who knows what happened with the Night Yord but I fucking bet they had issues with Yorbies pretending to be helpful just to kill them! Everyone, for two years, has been out to get them! They can't even sleep! And now they have to grind so hard or they fail. Adaine has a seemingly full time job after school basically every day because she literally can't afford to live? Fabian has taken on the most physically strenuous classes and sport one dude could and has dreams of also being a social legend because he's fucking lonely in that big house and he just wants to fill it. If anyone in the party fails or dies Riz is shit out of luck and wont ever get into a university? He so desperately wants his friends with him so he's working over time and ignoring his limits to make up for his party members not caring about the future. Fig is going through the strangest arc I've ever seen in my life? she's hard avoidant and taking three classes, so a 250% work load, because she's desperate to fill her time so she can't think about all the other work she has to do that if she ignores too long could crush her under the debt of her band from her label, or how alone she feels without her girlfriend around. Gorgug is so desperate to prove himself that he's doing four years of school work in one, trying to play catch up and also prove himself at the same time, he's taking it all so seriously but also is so fucking tired. And Kristen. Mother fucking Kristen "hey girlie" applebees. Expected to dedicate her life to a god with no direction, with the weight of failure being her gods death, while also being in school and also at your friends insistence needing to run for student body president and getting your priorities so mixed up and being completely left behind by her peers who didn't have to rework their entire world view and understanding of life in the span of a few months every few months.
The Bad Kids are in a terrible place. They're suffering. I want them to just say it out loud, to stop pretending they have it handled and are fine. I want Riz and Adaine to yell at the party to get their shit together. I want Fabian to tell someone how alone and abandoned her feels. I want Kristen to scream at Cassandra that she agrees, that it's not fair, she's just a kid, how could she be enough all on her own with no help? It sucks a god can only rely on a child, for both the god and child! They're both suffering from this arrangement! Neither is happy! I want Gorgug to beat the shit out of Porter with his inventions and rage at the same time, to make the best shit and use it in the most stunning way anyone has ever seen. I want Fig to finally get some freaking help, to have her teachers and parents reach out in a meaningful way and stop telling her to figure it out alone because clearly the pressure is too much for her to handle and she's drowning. I want someone, anyone, to look at the Bad Kids and tell them to stop. To help them. But I know it wont be that easy. I know it'll be the Rat Grinders yelling at how unfair it is the Bad kids get everything while they're on the sidelines that'll get under the Bad Kids skin and they'll yell about how awesome they are and that they didn't ask for any of this shit to happen to them and to fuck off. I know it's gonna get so much worse before it gets better. I know they'll figure it out and that it'll be a painful road there.
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cryptidghostgirl · 9 months ago
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Can I request a part 3 to "unrequited"?
A/N I honestly was not planning another part to this story. I'm just gonna... leave this here. (Pls don't hate me guys. This is so genuinely the only path I could think of for this story that I liked.)
Unrequited pt. 3 (Alastor x Reader)
Pairing: Alastor x Reader
Warnings: Um. Alastor is dark/yandere in this part. Uh. Unhealthy relationship. Yeah.
Word Count: 2,094
Previous Parts:
Unrequited (Alastor x Reader)
Unrequited Pt. 2
Master Lists:
Master Lists 
Hazbin Hotel Master List
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Alastor had cornered her in the hall. The years, the games, the challenges, none of it was fun anymore. It all came to an end tonight. There was no other option, not when she could die tomorrow. The angels were coming, and they were coming for the hotel.
"I don't want you here tomorrow."
"What!?" Y/n exclaimed in utter shock.
She hadn't known what to expect when Alastor had stopped her as she made her way downstairs to the bar. Everyone was supposed to be having a drink together, celebrating their afterlives that there was a chance they might loose. She didn't know what to expect but, she certainly hadn't expected this.
Alastor had been acting weird lately. He was always weird but ever since the day with Husk in the hallway, he'd been weird even by those standards. He was always finding something for Y/n to do that put her near him, always watching. It was irritating. They had been fighting a lot and Alastor still had yet to apologize to Husk.
"I don't want you at the hotel tomorrow. You are not coming near this fight."
"What the fuck, Alastor?" Y/n nearly stamped her foot on the floor, she crossed her arms and glared at the demon, "I... these are my friends. This is my home. I will do what I can to protect it."
"No, you wont. You wont be here." he paused, "I will use our little deal to make sure of that, if need be."
Y/n scoffed. Her anger was a fiery, radiant thing. Alastor found himself thinking she had always reminded him quite a bit of a lioness when she got like this. The thought had been an accident, he couldn't afford to be distracted. Not when these were the stakes. Alastor pushed it away.
"You fucking... literally why? Like, what? I... sorry, just taking me a bit to process this: the demon who tricked me into selling my soul to them is now going to use that contract to take me, a valuable asset, out of a war which we cannot afford to loose?"
"Yes." Alastor nodded.
"Because?" Y/n prompted in irritation after a moment.
Alastor sighed.
"Y/n, think about what could happen if you are here."
"The same thing that could happen to any one here!" Y/n threw her arms up in exasperation, gesticulating her frustration as she spoke, "The same thing you're forcing on Husk and Nifty, have you had this chat with either of them?"
Alastor didn't respond. It was all the answer she needed.
"Yeah, I didn't fucking think so!" she scoffed, "So it's okay for everyone to risk their lives -- it's okay for you to risk your life even, but not me? Its okay for you to force my friends to risk their lives, but you're going to force me to stay out of it? Listen to yourself, you sound ridiculous."
"We don't need your help. You're slow, you will only hold us back."
The comment he had hope would dampen Y/n's spirit, bend her will into submission, only added to her fire.
"I'm... that's bullshit and we both know it. I might be small, but so is Nifty. Everyone has skills they can offer. I know how to fight, how to survive, and we will have angelic weapons for Christ's sake. Like, I really don't understand what the issue your having is here."
"Y/n, just... no." Alastor shook his head, a hand to his temples, "No. You will not be here tomorrow. I forbid it. I'm sending you to stay with Rosie."
"What am I, your kid?" Y/n sneered.
Alastor looked over at her, his hand falling from his forehead.
"Just please, Y/n." he took a step forward, pulling her hands into his. Alastor took a deep breath. "For me."
Y/n's eyes went wide. Alastor could see the conflict, the swirling emotions. Anger turned to grief, mixed with gratitude, and became anger again. A never ending cycle.
His heart pounded against his chest, it fought him valiantly for release. It had been so long. So long since she'd looked at him with anything other than disgust, so long since she had let him touch her like this.
Y/n settled on confusion as her dominant emotion and pulled her hands from his grasp. Alastor mourned the contact, his hands still held up in the air where hers had met them as Y/n took a step away.
"Why."
It wasn't a question. Y/n commanded information and at the end of the day, he may own her soul but she owned his heart. Alastor felt like in some way, she always had. He couldn't bear the thought of loosing her but, he didn't know if he could handle the rejection either. There was no way, no chance, she would believe him if he told her too much of the truth but, lying wouldn't work either. It would have to be a careful balance, a calculated withholding of information. Too much was riding on tomorrow, on tonight, on this very moment.
"Because I don't want you to die."
Y/n's brow furrowed even further, their eyes growing wider still as she stumbled another step back. Her back was nearly against the wall now, there wasn't anywhere else she could go.
Her eyes flitted around the space fervently. Her lips formed words that never left her mouth. Alastor watched, stress eating him alive. At last, Y/n did something. She brought her hands to her head and sunk to the floor, her knees pulled into her chest.
"What are you doing to me." she muttered softly, just barely loud enough for him to hear.
For what felt like the thousandth time, Alastor felt a little piece of his heart fracture off. He didn't know how much more he could take of this before there was nothing left to break, nothing left to loose. She looked up at him, her hands still holding either side of her head and her eyes wet with tears.
"Why do you care?"
Alastor's breath caught in his throat. There was an insistence in her voice, a pleading. He stood in indecision for a moment, frozen by want, by need, by fear. His body took over as he took a step towards Y/n. Alastor kneeled down in front of her.
With great care, with a familiarity and gentleness Y/n hadn't felt from him in years, Alastor untangled her fingers from her hair. He held her hands in his once again and this time, he wasn't going to let go.
"Because I care about you."
Shock at his own bravery emanated from his chest. Alastor held his breath.
"You..." Y/n's eyes hardened, "I wish you'd stop messing with my head like this. Its not funny."
"Y/n, I'm not messing. I am not playing a game, I'm not..." Alastor sighed, letting go of one of Y/n's hands and running his hand through his hair as he looked to the side.
Taking a deep breath, he turned back to face her, grabbing her free hand once again.
"I don't know what I can do to prove it to you, that I'm not. But I will keep you safe. No matter what, you will not be here tomorrow."
"Please, Alastor."
His heart stopped. He couldn't recall the last time she'd asked him for anything that wasn't to leave her, Husk, and Nifty, alone. He couldn't recall the last time she'd seemed to fragile in his arms.
"Please, they're... they're my family. I can't..." a single tear rolled down Y/n's cheek, "I can't just leave them."
"I..."
There was a moment, a split second where he almost agreed. Alastor's eyes narrowed. He dropped Y/n's hands and got back to his feet. She adjusted her position in response, nearly kneeling before him.
"Please, Alastor. Let me help them. Let me do what I can to protect my family. Please. I'll do anything you want... I'll..."
It almost worked. Alastor felt his purpose waver again. Then the fear came back. He had already lost so much. His mother, his humanity, his own soul and free will. Alastor refused to add Y/n to the list of things that were so far out of his reach. He just couldn't. He didn't care if she hated him for the rest of eternity, as long as it meant she was safe at his side.
"No." he shook his head, his heart hardening, "You forget, you already have to do whatever I want. You forget, I own you."
Y/n's scream of anger as the shadows took her was muffled as she was sucked into their portal. Alastor stood, watching the spot she had been in for a few moments and then, he doubled over in pain. It shot through him in spikes, in daggers. It was the first time he had told her that. Not once before had Alastor ever said those three words to Y/n, not even when they had first made their deal. I own you.
The guilt, the regret, all of it underpinned by the overwhelming love. It had been trapped for so long, so sheltered and pushed back in the recesses of his mind that it had twisted. The love had become obsessive, dangerous, hungry.
With a breath, Alastor stood straight once again. Pushing his composure back to the surface, he smoothed his hair and went down to the bar to inform everyone of his decision. He may have forced Y/n to do something she didn't want to, fracturing things further than he'd believed possible, but he wasn't going to blame her for it. Alastor was used to being the villain and hopefully, in this case, he wouldn't have to be. Hopefully, they would understand.
Y/n gasped for breath as she was let out of the shadow portal. Panting on all fours, slowly she brought herself back together. Y/n had met Rosie before, once or twice. She knew she was a kind soul at heart, a reasonable person, and she knew that Rosie's cannibals were the main force of their army tomorrow. All she had to do was convince the overlord to let her join them, and it would be okay.
Taking a deep breath to restore her confidence, Y/n looked up. Her heart dropped.
"No."
She got to her feet, looking carefully around the decrepit old radio tower.
"No. Nonono."
Her breaths becoming panicked, she ran to the door. It was locked. Taking a step back, she kicked it harshly. The firm wood didn't budge.
Driven by adrenaline alone, Y/n ran to the windows and began to hit them with all her might. None of them so much as trembled.
"No!"
She looked wildly around the space and, spotting Alastor's chair, picked it up. Y/n hurled it at the window. There was a crash and for a split second, there was hope. That was until she realized it was the chair that had broken, not the window.
"No! No!"
Turning back to the door, she hurled her body repeatedly against it. Each time, she got the biggest running start she could. Each time, there was no change at all, nothing happened. Fresh tears pooled in her eyes, she was long past panicked now.
"NO!"
After about twenty minutes, Y/n was out of breath and exhausted. Her whole body hurt and her face was sticky with tears. She sat at the door, her back pressed against it and her knees pulled into her chest. Burying her face in her legs, she sobbed.
Everyone was at the hotel, except for her. Everyone was preparing to fight for and protect what they loved, except for her. What would they think? What would they say? Much more importantly, would they make it out?
A sudden fear gripped her, a fist around her heart. Would she ever see any of them again? Y/n's sobs redoubled.
"Fucking..."
She sniffed, her panic and grief quickly fixing itself back in the shape of the familiar anger. She could see him in her minds eye, that moment his eyes had softened, that moment she thought that maybe he had been telling the truth all along, that they really had been friends, that he really did care.
"I hate you Alastor!" she screamed to herself, alone in the dark, "I hate you and I will continue to hate you until the day I fucking die again!"
----
A/N I love an irredeemable villain and doomed, misshapen love. I'm sorry to anyone who wanted this to end up happy.
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shrewsburysworld · 3 months ago
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YANDERE POPULAR BOY JUNGKOOK | PART 3
Part 1, Part 2, Part 4
Warning:- Accusations of infidelity, murder, delusion behaviour.
*This is a fan fiction. completely fictional. The behaviour of characters in this fiction is not something to emulate. You are responsible for your own consumption. Thank you.*
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Yandere Jungkook spoiled you rotten with his luxury, be it the latest market pieces of jewellery or designer clothes.
Yet it never fascinated you, your world became a gilded prison. he showered you with every comfort, yet it was a life devoid of freedom.
Jungkook believed his love was pure and his obsession was justified. To him you were everything, he didn't force you to sleep with him. and you were thankful for that. Maybe he actually loved you, but he was a mentally ill person.
You felt sorry but being trapped in your golden cage began to suffocate you under the weight of his so-called love.
So you took your chance and tried to play with his mind and sanity. you accused him of things he couldn't understand - infidelity, deceit - things that baffled him because his devotion to you was absolute.
One evening, in the grand but empty mansion you shared, you confronted Jungkook. "You're seeing someone else, aren't you?" you whispered, tears brimming in your eyes.
You couldn't afford to take someone else's name because what if he hurt them, you know he is capable of doing that. Jungkook stared at you confused and hurt. "No!! There's no one but you. How could you think that?"
But you wouldn't listen. You wanted out, wanted to escape the suffocating grip of a love that was slowly killing you. In your desperation, you filed for a divorce, hoping to use the accusation of infidelity as your escape route.
The thought of losing you Jungkook to madness. He didn’t understand your accusations, but if there was someone you believed he was cheating with, that person had to be eliminated. His love for you was so consuming that it twisted his logic, turning his actions into something dark and dangerous.
Jungkook began to watch those around him, scrutinizing every woman he interacted with, searching for a hint of the betrayal you believed existed. Then, one day, a colleague’s innocent touch on his arm during a business meeting ignited a spark of rage within him. She was the one you feared. She was the one who would take you away from him.
Driven by his delusion, Jungkook arranged a meeting with the colleague, luring her under the guise of business. It was there, in a secluded penthouse suite, that he ended her life with cold precision. He felt no remorse—only a sense of duty fulfilled, believing he had removed the threat to his marriage.
When you heard the news, you were horrified. Jungkook confessed to you, not out of guilt, but out of love. “I did it for us, Baby!!. She was the reason you wanted to leave. Now we can be together, without anyone coming between us.”
Your blood ran cold. You realized that your accusations, born out of a desperate need to escape, had pushed Jungkook over the edge. His love was not just obsessive; it was deadly. You was trapped, more than ever, in a nightmare from which there was no escape.
Jungkook, oblivious to the terror in your eyes, pulled you close, whispering sweetly, “Now, my love, you’ll never leave me.”
As the walls of the mansion seemed to close in on her, your dreams of freedom shattered like glass. You were his, forever bound by a love that was as painful as it was powerful.
*This is original work. Do not copyright*
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Hey Army!! Thank you so much for loving Yandere Jungkook series. If you guys have any further ideas or imaginations for the continuation of this series drop a message/request. 🫶🫶
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junebugsarchive · 7 days ago
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𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 . jake kim
𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 '𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍'𝐓 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 / 𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐌𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐌𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 . . . ♡
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summary: you and jake used to be as thick as thieves back in middle school, even when he became part of the notorious gang big deal. that is, until a miscommunication and jake's stubbornness leads to a heart-breaking fall out, and you never saw or heard of him until a few years later. now jake wants you back in his life, but are you ready to accept him so willingly again?
pairing: jake kim / kim gimyung x reader
details: slight mentions of harassment . cursing & violence . really, really long (wc 11.9k words, sorry everyone ) . all dividers used are from @cafekitsune, pictures from pinterest !
a/n: first ever work wowow >< this fanfic is mostly just to give u guys a taste of my writing style hehe <3 this has been in my drafts for a long time already... finally got the courage to post! hope u guys love, mwah mwah ♡
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                Jake Kim will never forget the day he met you. He was fifteen, in his second year at Gangseo Middle School, sleeping soundly at his desk while the teacher at the front droned on about something - he was too lazy to care anyways.
                "Hey!" Someone suddenly slammed both hands onto his table, making him blink blearily, fuzzily looking up in annoyance at the culprit, ready to give them the beating of their life.
                A girl grinned back down at him, her prim and neat uniform a stark contrast to the dirt and grime on the rest of the students, and the blood and cracks coating the walls of their classroom. Jake blinked at her as he straightened his back, opening his mouth to yawn. He had no idea there was a girl in this school.
                "I transferred here a week ago," The girl chirped, as if sensing Jake's thoughts. "My name's [Name] [Last name], nice to meet you!"
                "What do you want?" Jake asked brusquely, ignoring her introduction as he dug in his pocket for a snack, groaning inwardly when he realized that he had eaten them all already. "Go away, kid. This school isn't a place for a girl like you."
                She frowned as she watched him, putting one hand on her hip as she pouted slightly. "I'm not a kid, I'm just a year younger than you!" She replied defiantly. "Besides, this was the only school my aunt could afford."
                Jake raised his eyebrow at this. This girl... was intriguing, at the least. More so annoying, but Jake decided to pardon her overly-zealous attitude. "What do you want?" He repeated in annoyance, nevertheless. "If you don't want anything, go away. I'm trying to sleep here."
                "Protect me."
                Jake paused, just as he was about to close his eyes again, and raised his head, narrowing his eyes at the girl, who was still smiling in a carefree manner. "Excuse me?" He asked, unsure whether to be offended or weirded out by this demand.
                The girl shrugged. "I'm a girl," She explained. "Well, the only girl in this school at least. My auntie couldn't afford anything else, so I had to lie to her and tell her I have a nice friend here that could protect me. Which, obviously isn't true." The girl paused here, looking straight into Jake Kim's eyes without a hint of fear or hesitance. "I can do stuff for you. Your homework, quizzes, tests, whatever. Just please protect me while I'm in this school, until my auntie can get me to transfer, then I'll be out of your hair."
                Jake nearly laughed at this. This girl had the audacity to ask him to help her beat up any guy that essentially looked at her wrong, because she wasn't able to do so herself? She should've just chosen to be home-schooled, or just worked her ass off to make money at a young age instead. "No," He replied bluntly, settling himself back down onto his table, ready to doze off until the end of the day. "Bold of you to assume I want to do well in my studies, anyways. Now go away, kid. I want to sleep."
                You frowned in disappointment. Sure, you weren't a hundred percent certain that the school's most notorious fighter would actually help you, but your optimistic side was really hoping that he'd agree to your crazy demands. "Ok," You relented, rummaging through the plastic bag you'd brought along with you, before bringing out a little Kuromi lunchbox and gently placing it beside the boy's head. "I brought some food, by the way. If you don't wanna eat it it's fine." You wait for a few seconds, but it had become apparent that either Jake was ignoring you, or he was already asleep. "Well, bye Jake." You left, making sure to gently close the door behind you.
                You should have tried harder to convince Jake. You really should have. Because right now, you were in a super uncomfortable situation you wish you could have avoided one way or another. Found blackmail on Jake Kim to make him protect you? Nah, he'd kill you in an instant. Whine and whine and beg for his protection? Still kill you anyways. Fuck, nothing you could have done would make Jake relent.
                Your eye twitched slightly as you heard the boy sat next to you call you 'sweet cheeks' for probably the hundredth time in the past few hours, then proceed to claim that you were his 'girlfriend'. Yeah, right! He was so ugly even mirrors would shatter if they saw him. Another vulgar comment about your ass made you feel like breaking your pencil. Screw being polite to potentially dangerous boys, you were ready to break this guy's arm. You cringed when the guy stupidly decided to make a move and loop an arm around your shoulder, making kissy faces as he slowly drew closer to you. You shivered in horror - this pervert was about to try and kiss you!
                "Hell no." You groaned, gingerly pushing his face away from yours as you stood up, ready to get out of this hellhole. No way this guy actually thought he had a chance with you. Not with his personality.
                "The fuck did you just say, bitch?" The same guy growled, slowly standing up to tower above you, the rest of the class following in suit. It was clear that he was the king in this class, and even the teacher at the front was shivering in his seat, too afraid to say anything.
                "I said, hell no." You repeated, throwing all caution to the wind. "I'm not your girlfriend, so please stop acting like I gave you permission to touch me all you want."
                The guy's goons began to menacingly crack their knuckles and bring out bats from god-knows-where, you were starting to regret making a scene.
                "Disrespectful bitch." The leader spat out, slowly advancing on you. "And disrespectful bitches get taught a lesson." This must have been a sort of cue, because the goons began to jump over desks and chairs to run at you, fully prepared to beat the shit out of you.
                "Oh fuck," You mumbled, before darting out of the class - thank god your seat was the closest to the door - speeding through the hallways while the boys behind you screamed bloody murder.
                You really should have exercised more, because in a matter of minutes, you were already starting to feel stitches coming in, and wheezing pathetically as you began to slow down, giving one of the more athletic goons the chance to grab your hair, making you shout in pain as your scalp burned, bringing tears to your eyes as you struggled in his grasp, kicking and flailing like a wild animal.
                "Yo, boss! I got her!" The goon shouted excitedly, grunting slightly as he kept you under his iron grip. "Stay still you bitch-!"
                A loud bam made you flinch, instinctively reaching up to cover your ears. Did someone blow up a part of the school? You blink, realising the goon wasn't restraining you, before slowly looking to the wall beside you, seeing a human's head smushed into the cement, acutely aware of a person standing behind you. Slowly you look up, your face breaking out into a happy smile upon seeing Jake Kim, one hand holding the goon's head into the wall, the other holding up your Kuromi lunchbox to you.
                "The food was okay," Jake said blankly, though the twitch at the corner of lips said otherwise. Letting you gladly receive the empty lunchbox from his grasp, he slowly surveyed the frozen goons, their leader at the front, before looking at the heads peeking out from the classrooms, his eyes darting towards your slightly trembling form. His eyes softened, peeling his jacket off his form to drape over you, giving your head a small pat before walking in front of you.
                "I have a deal for you," You perk up upon hearing his voice, his form still relaxed as the goons in front of him shifted into battle stances, fully believing they could take him down. "You make me those lunches everyday, and I'll protect you." Without even waiting for a response (you would have said yes anyways), he immediately lunged forward, meeting the boys in front of him with a flurry of fists and legs.
                The fight ended just as quickly as it had started. Jake Kim was standing tall among the unconscious bodies, his uniform bloodied but still intact. You gingerly stepped over the bodies, meeting the boy in the middle as you eyed his dirty form judgmentally, snuggling deeper into the warm jacket. "Ew," You hum. "I should wash your clothes too."
                "Whatever," He replies blankly, slouching down again, his tall and prideful aura when fighting nowhere to be seen now. "Let's go. I wanna sleep." You brighten again, humming a cheerful tune as you trot after him, a skip in your step.
                "Hey, what do you wanna eat tomorrow? Bibimbap? Bulgogi?" A grunt was your only response.
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                A year has passed since you met Jake Kim. Since Jake was being held back a year (you scolded him for this, though you were pretty sure he wasn't even listening), you were now in the same class as him, which relieved you, since you no longer had to walk past judgemental eyes from every class to deliver his daily lunchbox.
                Humming a happy little tune, you halted outside your class, classroom 2-1, skidding to a halt as you nearly bumped into two tall freshmen exiting the classroom at the same time.
                "Sorry," The shorter one says absentmindedly as they brush past you, the taller one's dreadlocks nearly smacking you in the face. Scrunching your nose, you poke out your tongue at them, before entering the classroom.
                Jake was awake when you entered, staring silently at two packs of orange gum resting neatly on his table.
                "Who's that from?" You asked curiously, watching as he slowly unwrapped one, popping the gum into his mouth, and began chewing obnoxiously. "Ooh, Jake's got admirers?"
                "Just some freshmen that wanted to be head," Jake replied nonchalantly, offering one to you, which you took and popped into your mouth. "And is it that surprising I'm awesome enough to have admirers?"
                "Stop being so egoistical," You grumbled, noticing the faraway look in your friend's eyes. "What, thinking about how old you are now for freshmen to be having the guts to challenge you?" Jake's gracious reply is a side-eye in your direction.
                "Be right back," He suddenly hums, standing up from his seat to his full height, effectively towering over you. "Don't move, alright?" He ruffles your hair like some puppy, momentarily making you freeze up, before leaving the classroom. You sigh, shutting your eyes tightly as you plopped into your seat, which was right beside his, banging your head onto the table and covering it with your arms to hide the growing red on your cheeks. Stupid Jake Kim, you think to yourself in annoyance. Making me have a crush on him... Stupid...
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                Another few months rolled by in a flash. There were two new members of the Jake's Followers Squad, namely Jason Yoon and Brad Lee, who were more than happy to beat anyone up that simply looked at you or Jake wrong, eagerly accepting any and all lunchboxes you gave to them. You swear, you could give them a lunchbox with rat poison inside and they'd gobble it up in a matter of seconds.
                Morning assembly in the courtyard was always boring. The principal would always ramble about how the students should be grateful for all the teachers and the equipment in the school, while the students down below slowly fell asleep one by one.
                "Everyone listen up!" A teacher shouted, clearly trying to suck up to the principal. "The principal has an announcement to make!"
                You groan as an old man in an expensive suit - clearly out of his salary - walked up to the podium and began his daily speech. "I wanna sleep..." You whine under your breath, as Brad and Jason nod in agreement behind you.
                "Prestige, my ass." Jason yawns.
                "What bullshit." Brad follows in suit.
                In front of them, Jake stays quiet, shutting his eyes as he effortlessly falls asleep standing upright, making you groan as you fan yourself. Fuck this weather, honestly.
                A loud creak by the entrance made the four of you turn towards it, curious to see what the commotion is about.
                "What's going on?" The principal shouts in panic through the microphone. "What are you guys doing by the gate?!" His question goes unanswered as the students slowly pull the gate open. "Hey, shut the gate at once!"
                Jake's eyes narrow at the sleek black limousine that rumbles through the now-open gate, and the students that bow ninety-degrees towards the vehicle. You blink; that was some surprisingly high level of standard and discipline the once-rowdy boys of this school had.
                "Welcome sir!" The students shout. "It's an honour!"
                The limousine's engine vroomed loudly, before it suddenly sped towards the crowd of students, who shouted in panic and quickly backed out of the car's way, only for it to skid to a halt - right in front of Jake Kim. The boy simply raises an eyebrow at the vehicle, his tall shoulders blocking your view of whoever stepped out of the car.
                "Damn..." The man hummed as he stepped out of his car, circle-shaped sunglasses perched neatly on his nose as he leaned on his car, hands placed in his pockets. "It sure is hard to drive in the school zone." His eyes wander to Jake - not that anyone could tell with his tinted sunglasses.
                "Good to see you," The man, Sinu Han, greets amicably. "Head of Gangseo Middle School; Jake Kim." His lips suddenly stretch into a wide grin. "Join Big Deal."
                "No," Was Jake's immediate response. "I'm not going to join Big Deal."
                "Whoa... so assertive!" Sinu continues smiling, unaffected by Jake's harsh rejection. "Why not?"
                "I don't do thugs." He answers sharply.
                "I'm not a thug."
                "Bullshit." Jake was quick to reply. "Everything about you screams 'thug'."
                "Damn, you got me." Sinu shrugs uncaringly, which slightly infuriated the boy.
                "Stop messing with me and go." He takes a gum out of his pocket, popping it into his mouth as he chewed, blowing a small bubble. "I'm sick of dealing with you thugs." And as he brushes past the man, Sinu observes quietly as you, Brad and Jason follow quietly after him, the son of Gapryoung Kim slowing down a little to subtly look back at you, raising an eyebrow almost inquisitively, silently asking if you were okay.
                Sinu Han watches in amusement as you nod your head brightly, and only then does Jake turn back and disappear into the school. "Ah, young love." He muses quietly as he turns around and heads back to his car. "Kinda reminds me of the romance of Big Deal."
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                To be honest, you weren't all that surprised when Jake joined Big Deal. Sure, it was a little dangerous to hang out on a street full of gangsters with the possibility of getting attacked any second, but you understood that your three friends could protect themselves.
                Somehow, you found yourself wrapped up in the gang's shenanigans too. You were sort of an unofficial official member now, finding yourself managing Big Deal's finances and spending, even going as far as to help the gang put aside some money to invest in stocks. Due to your connection with Jake and Sinu, you were placed pretty high up in the ranks, as the sixth-in-command. It wasn't really high, like Jake, who was second-in-command, but everyone in Big Deal still genuinely respected you for your kindness - and home-cooked food, of course.
                "WELCOME, SIR!" Everyone bowed immediately, in one swift motion, their bodies bent a perfect ninety degrees as Big Deal's Number 3; Samuel Seo smoothly brushed past in his neatly ironed Big Deal coat, a cigarette between his lips. One of members of Big Deal caught his eye, making him pause directly in front of him.
                "Where's your coat?" He asked.
                "I was in a rush and forgot to wear it, sir!" The member replied loudly, scratching his head nervously, knowing he was fucked.
                "Is that so?" Samuel asked softly. A loud smack rang through the street as the member's face was snapped to the side, having been slapped by Samuel. "Does that mean you're not a member of Big Deal anymore?" The other members winced as they watched Samuel scold the boy that forgot his coat, said boy nodding nervously as he held his swollen cheek.
                "Samuel, don't be so harsh." You frowned a little, chastising the third-in-command as you stepped between the boy and Samuel, your Big Deal coat swooshing behind you as the boy looked at you like an angel that had just descended from heaven. "It was just one time. He won't forget again, right?" You smile kindly at the boy, who nodded fervently with a grateful smile on his face. 
                "Yes Ma'am!" He practically shouts, bowing profusely as you nod and wave him away, before speeding off, probably to go tell his friends about his encounter with you.
                "You're too soft," Samuel grumbles lowly as the two of you watch a bunch of Big Deal members crowd around him, exclaiming about how lucky he was to interact with the so-called 'Angelic Number 6' of Big Deal. "Gangs like Big Deal are all about discipline and respect. If you let him off so easily, he's going to take advantage of it."
                "You're just too harsh," You repeat your words from before, rolling your eyes. "You need to chill, Samuel. It's the first time he forgot his coat, right? You didn't need to slap him so hard, I could already see the bruise forming."
                "It's the third." Samuel mumbles petulantly, but even he knows better than to argue with you. For all he knew, the next meal you gave him could include a few worms for noodles. 
                He watches you leave, smiling and waving at every Big Deal member you come across, all of which smile stupidly and wave enthusiastically, or jaw drops and bows lower than they should, the same fervent look in all of their eyes.
                Stupid girl, Samuel thinks to himself as he watches you, walking freely with the Big Deal coat hanging off your shoulders, practically unaware of the weight of your role. Walking so freely, without a single care in the world. He wishes he could be like you.
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                Big Deal was in its golden era for months. Ever since you, Jake and Samuel joined, profits have been soaring higher than anyone has ever seen, and no gang has decided to mess with Big Deal - except for the stupid ones.
                Nevertheless, life was looking great. You had an amazing group of friends that you laughed with and ate with, your aunt was starting to earn more money, so you could afford better ingredients for the food you cooked for Big Deal.
                You and Samuel, surprisingly, got along like a house on fire, something Jake wasn't too happy with, but never spoke up about. Just like you, Samuel loved money almost as much as he loved fighting, and the two of you would have in depth discussions about the best way to earn a lot of money for Big Deal while budgeting for about a hundred or so members. Despite your earlier grudges about him kicking a cute little boy named Johan out, he was quite friendly, underneath his tough exterior.
                Jake, on the other hand, got along like a house on fire with Sinu, which wasn't very surprising. Sinu had a very blatant favouritism towards the boy, and wasn't shy in showing it either. You didn't appreciate the leader of Big Deal proudly favouring Jake, but you never spoke up about it either.
                Admittedly, you still had that stupid little crush on Jake. Surprise, surprise, after months of being with Jake in gang, and seeing all of his sides - from the positive ones to the negative ones, you still found him handsome, deep down to the core.
                Samuel didn't appreciate you fawning over Jake in front of him - and yes, he knew because you told him. He'd roll his eyes, sigh and scoff whenever you brought the name up, knowing he was up for another session of 'Oh-my-gosh-did-you-see-how-Jake-took-those-guys-down' or 'Jake-looks-even-better-today'. But he never complained, which was something you appreciated. It was easy talking to the stoic and monotonous Samuel (arguably), since talking to anyone else essentially meant they would snitch to Jake, even Yeonhui and Sinu. Samuel didn't care enough to tell Jake, but at least he cared enough to listen while you talked his ears off.
                However, over the past few days, you noticed that Samuel became more prickly whenever you brought up Jake. He'd scoff - genuinely scoff, not the kind where he'd scoff but still listen, and make up some excuse to avoid you talking about Jake. Occasionally, when he'd lie that he had a phone call or he needed to check on the shops, you'd nod quietly, but stare questioningly as he walked away. You wondered what had happened between the two.
                One day, your aunt called. You were strolling around Big Deal street with Samuel, the two of you noting which parts of the street needed to be cleaned or repaired, when your phone rang in your coat pocket. Pausing, you dug your phone out, clicking on the 'answer' button when you saw the caller address.
                "Hi auntie, what's up?" You hum cheerfully, as Samuel pauses to patiently wait for you as well, lighting up a cigarette in the mean time.
                "[Name]!" Your aunt speaks cheerfully, her happy tone making you tilt your head. She'd never sounded so happy in the years you had lived with her. "I've gotten a huge promotion. It can earn me a lot of money for both of us!" Your face breaks out into a happy grin when you hear the news.
                "Auntie, that's great!" You beam, though she couldn't see it. "Should we eat KFC tonight?" Your aunt laughs, but it trails off a bit at the end. "What's wrong, auntie?"
                "My new job is in another part of Seoul, so we're going to have to move away."
                Your face went slack, eyes only widening slightly in shock. Samuel looked up questioningly upon your silence, inwardly noting the look of shock on your face.
                "[Name]?" Your aunt asks quietly, upon hearing nothing from you. "Are you okay with it? I know how close you are to your friends here... If not it's fine, I can reject the offer-"
                "No!" You say quickly, clearing your throat, before quickly regaining your composure. "It's fine, aunty. I can't wait. When do we leave?"
                "This coming Friday." Your aunt replies, her tone careful to gauge your reaction. "Are you sure you're okay with it?"
                "I'm fine," You say, trying your best to sound cheerful. Today was Tuesday. You only had two days, not counting today, to say your farewells. "Congratulations on that promotion, auntie! You deserve it."
                "Thank you, dear." You could practically hear her fond smile from the other line. "I'll hang up now, but I'll tell you the details at home. Love you, bye!"
                "Bye, auntie." You say, but the line had already gone dead. You suck in a deep breath, staring at the 'call ended' on your screen. It was dead silent for a while as Samuel observed your face.
                "So," He finally says, breaking the silence. "When are you telling Big Deal?"
                "Soon," You say resolutely, sighing as you ruffle your hair, suddenly feeling exhausted. "Keep it a secret from them until then, please?"
                Samuel raises his eyebrow at your plea, scoffing as he puffs out smoke. "Why should I?" He asks, smirking infuriatingly. You sigh at his reaction - clearly you expected too much of him.
                "I just don't want them to be sad." You finally say, a look of fondness in your eyes as you take in the street before you, a street you were proud to take part in building up to its glory. Your dearest pride and joy, Big Deal. "Jake's got a lot on his plate too, y'know? Sinu oppa's thinking of stepping down, and I heard there were talks of a guy messing up the other gangs around this area. They've got enough to worry about, they can't worry about me. They can't." You repeat the last sentence, eyes glazing over as Samuel watches you from the corner of his eye.
                "It's always Jake." Samuel mutters, barely catching himself in time to glimpse you curiously looking over him.
                "What?" You ask, making him quickly clear his throat and look away.
                "I'll keep your little secret." He grumbles, watching your expression light up as you give him a happy smile.
                "Really? Thank you, Samuel!" You rush forward, giving him a hug before gasping, checking your phone. "Oh, my auntie will be back soon! I gotta buy KFC, see you Samuel!" Without waiting for his reply, you dash away, breathlessly shouting a greeting to every Big Deal member you crossed.
                Samuel Seo watches you go with a sinking heart, his expression relaxing as he sighs and scratches the back of his head, trying hard to ignore the warmth in his chest. After all this time, it's always been Jake.
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                You didn't show up the next day. Samuel pretends like your absence isn't a big deal, and carries on with his daily routine of supervising the members and scolding those who didn't wear their jackets. Who cares, anyways. You were probably just busy packing with your auntie to go somewhere else. It's not like he couldn't find out where you were going and visit you. He shakes the thought away, schooling his expression to one of blankness as he marks down another renovation needed to be made, strolling down the street.
                Inwardly, he felt somewhat triumphant that he knew something about you that Jake didn't. Watching him go around like a lost child, asking if anyone had seen you today was quite amusing, especially more so because he, Samuel Seo, knew before Jake did.
                He wouldn't miss you, Samuel reminded himself. Just another Big Deal member needing to move away. No big deal.
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                On Thursday, Goo Kim came. Samuel watched on as Sinu was defeated, by a teen barely older than him, with bleached blonde hair and a joker attitude. He and Jake watched over Sinu as he rested, one man's mind in a turmoil and the other a calm sea.
                "Samuel," He clenched his teeth, hating how he automatically looked up at the boy.
                "What?" Samuel shoots back with gritted teeth, looking back down towards Sinu.
                "Where's [Name]?" Jake asks quietly, staring down at the floor with a blank expression, dark eyes a brewing storm.
                Samuel looks at him for a moment, his mind in a turmoil. He wanted to rile Jake up, just a little bit. And yet... his mind flashes to your face, knowing you'd be so upset if he caused a rift between you and your best friend. Best. Friend. Samuel clenches his jaw, and makes his mind up. "Took the day off." He's careful to keep his tone neutral and casual, as if he was oblivious to how Jake was slowly getting angrier and angrier. "Said she had more important stuff to take care of."
                The second-in-command nods silently, before getting up and saying he's going outside to get some fresh air. Samuel nods, and when the door closes, he lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding in, and stares down at Sinu. He thinks he feels guilty, but maybe not after all.
                Outside, Jake Kim is having a mental breakdown. More important things my ass, He thinks furiously, closing his eyes to take a deep breath to calm himself down. What's more important than Big Deal that she couldn't tell me herself?
                He sighs, smoothing back his hair. Tomorrow, He tells himself. Tomorrow, I'll deal with her.
                Tomorrow never came.
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                Friday rolled past in a blur for you. Your auntie was so busy with paperwork and events, you had to help pack everything in your tiny little apartment, which had shockingly a lot of things. This took two days to pack by yourself, and on Friday, you found yourself whirled away by your aunt early in the morning to go to the train station, with no chance of saying your goodbyes. Inwardly, you scolded yourself for procrastinating your farewells, but brushed it aside as you admired the greenery that rolled past your window. You could easily text them, no problem.
                When you arrived at your new apartment, it was already late at night. Overwhelmed by exhaustion, you crashed onto your new bed, not even bothering to unpack or shower, and slept soundly till Saturday noontime.
                Once you woke up, you were determined to say your proper goodbyes. Grabbing your phone off the nightstand, you switched it on, clicking on Jake's chatbox before typing out your message.
[name] 🧚
hey, so sorry i didn't show up the past few days! was
super busy with stuff, i'll lyk thru call, just text me
when u have time, k? x
Seen
                Jake's reply came almost instantaneously, and your brows furrowed the more you read.
jakey (gyat) 🍑
I can't believe you. What 'stuff' were you even busy with?
Why weren't you here when we needed you? I'm starting to
think you don't even care about Big Deal. And you can't even
tell me face to face? I really can't believe you, [Name]. Don't
text or call me until you can tell me straight to my face what
exactly was so important you couldn't be here with us.
Seen
This person has blocked your contact.
You can no longer text or call this person
                Your brows furrowed, feeling hurt as you reread Jake's message once, twice and three times. What had happened the two days you weren't there? Clicking out of Jake's chatbox, you were determined to clear up whatever misunderstanding happened between you and your friend.
                Scrolling through your contact list, you clicked on the groupchat you had made with Brad, Jason and Jerry, originally meant for when you wanted to plan Jake's birthday party last year, but ended up as a groupchat where you and the rest of Jake's loyal fanclub would discuss anything (positive, of course) related to their boss (like the memes the four of you had created regarding Jake, though you all swore never to tell anyone about them).
Boss Jake's Fanclub 🍑
president [name]
guys what happened while i was gone and why
is jake mad at me rn?
Seen by all
hello?
Seen by all
guys please tell me i really don't know what
happened
Seen by all
jason 👠
i'm kinda going against boss jake's orders
but
on thursday sinu got defeated by some guy called
goo kim and jake's mad that you didn't show up.
he told everyone in big deal to block your
number and not talk to you at all until you talk to
him face to face.
                Your eyes widened as you slowly sat up in your bed, heading spinning as you slowly read through Jason's message. Sinu? Defeated? And Jake was angry that you were absent?
president [name]
i had a good reason, i swear.
im sorry i never told you guys sooner but my auntie
got a job promotion so i had to help her pack and
i left yesterday morning.
i really wanted to tell you guys about it but everyone
looked so stressed and tired i just didn't want to make
it worse.
im sorry everyone, i'll get ready to leave tomorrow to
explain everything to jake.
Seen by all
baby kwon 💗
I think it is better if you don't, [Name].
Boss Jake is very stressed right now, and I don't
think he wants to talk to anybody right now. Goo
Kim and his accomplice, Gun Park, said that we
have to pay them 100 million won every month if
we want Big Deal to survive, so everyone's very
tense right now.
I don't mean to be rude, but if you come back, Boss
Jake will be even more stressed.
brad (nail artist <3)
sorry [name].
we all miss you though.
we'll have to delete this chat bc if boss jake sees
this he'd kill us all.
Seen by all
president [name]
it's okay.
thanks guys.
Seen by all
baby kwon 💗 has removed you from the chat
baby kwon 💗 has left the chat
jason 👠 has left the chat
brad (nail artist <3) has left the chat
                You switched off your phone, staring at the black screen blankly.
                That day, your auntie had to console you nonstop as you cried your heart out, all the way until you fell asleep from exhaustion, tears still dripping down your eyes as your head hit the pillow.
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                A few months later, a sleek-looking Samuel Seo paid you a visit. Your aunt was out working and you were watching television while eating fried chicken when your doorbell rang.
                Upon opening your front door, you were greeted with an unbelievably taller Samuel in a neatly ironed white suit, with a bunch of men standing behind him.
                "Samuel!" Your face lit up as you smiled warmly at your sudden guest. "Oh wow, you've grown taller!"
                "Hi, [Name]." He nods at you, the corner of his lips curling into a half smirk. "Can I come in?"
                "Of course, of course!" You unlocked your door, ushering him inside as you threw a curious look towards the men still stationed outside your house. They looked strange, in well-ironed suits that didn't scream 'We believe in the romance of Big Deal'. "Do they want to come in, or...?"
                "They'll stay where they are." Samuel replies dismissively, barely giving the men a glance as he looked around your house. "Nice place you got here."
                "Sorry for the mess," You say apologetically as you hurriedly switch off the television and clear away your chicken. "I wasn't expecting anyone to visit. I'll get you some tea. Make yourself at home!"
                Samuel sat down on your couch, watching as you bustled around in the kitchen, inwardly knowing you wouldn't treat him so kindly if you knew what news he came bearing.
                "So," You plop down opposite him, pouring him a cup of tea before pouring one for yourself. "What's up? How's Big Deal?"
                "Ah..." Samuel slowly took a sip from his cup of tea, the warm liquid running down his throat. "I left Big Deal."
                You paused, looking up at him in shock as he set down his cup with a sharp 'clink'. "What?" You say disbelievingly, glancing down at the shiny badge on his collar, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. "But... you love Big Deal."
                "Loved," he corrected, unfazed by your piercing stare. "After Sinu was defeated, I realized that frankly, Big Deal was still a mile away from what I wanted to achieve." He gave you a professional smile, smoothening his hair. "Absolute power."
                "So what," You scoff, head still spinning. "Big Deal was just another stepping stone to you?"
                "Precisely," He didn't even bother sugarcoating it. "And now, I'm inviting you to do the same. I know that you still think of yourself as a member of Big Deal, though Jake may not feel the same."
                Underneath the table, your fists clench.
                The tea in your cup has quickly gone cold.
                "Join Workers. We will give you all the power and money you could ever want. We won't turn our back on you just because you need to take a few days leave without prior notice. Don't you want your aunt to stop suffering? Don't you want to live a lavish lifestyle, to have anything you want at a snap of your finger?" He leaned closer to you, and you could practically smell dirty money oozing from him. "Join Workers, [Name]. You won't regret it."
                You were silent for a while, before lifting your head as you stared at Samuel, a fire burning in your eyes.
                "So you're saying all I need to do is turn my back on Big Deal and join you?"
                Samuel hums in affirmation, his eyes gleaming in victory. He celebrated too early.
                Lifting your arm, you stand up, grabbing your cup of tea and mercilessly splashing the liquid all over Samuel, glaring at him as he calmly wiped the liquid away from his face with a handkerchief.
                "Like hell I will," You grit out, eyes blazing as you set down the cup with a loud bang, before pointing towards your door, hand trembling slightly. "Get the fuck out of my house, Samuel. I'm not a fucking traitor, unlike you piece of shit."
                You were half expecting him to get angry and punch you, but instead he chuckled almost good-naturedly and got up to leave.
                "Alright," He says easily, brushing past you. "That's fine, [Name]. It's not like you have a gang to go back to even if you refuse my offer."
                You were left there standing alone as the door shuts with a loud bang, fists trembling as you stared at the table.
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                A year had passed since you had unofficially been kicked out of Big Deal. You had learned to push down the nostalgia and tears that the gang had brought every time you thought about them, and buried yourself in studies. Your new school, J High, was admittedly elite and quite expensive, but thanks to the scholarship you had scored from a company called H Group, the school fees were much cheaper.
                Originally, you felt extremely insecure about your background and looks, since almost everybody in J High was either good looking or rich, or in some cases, both, but you quickly adapted to your new environment, comfortably securing yourself a spot as an almost invisible girl, not too invisible for people to forget your name, but not too unique to be popular.
                During your third year, your department had some interesting freshmen. The Architecture Department was known for being an all-boys department for years (until you arrived), since 1) they were mostly gang members and 2) the girls were too scared to join. But the new first years were... unique, to say the least.
                Originally, you had thought they were just another bunch of rowdy teenage boys picking fights and smoking at the back of the school, but you were pleasantly surprised to hear chatter of how they were more mellow (which spoke a lot) and a boy in the first year had formed some sort of gang that apparently 'punished bad guys', called Burn Knuckles.
                Your curiosity piquing, you decided to volunteer to be the Architecture Department's student guide for the first years.
                The leader of Burn Knuckles, Euntae Lee, was a very amusing boy. When the teacher first introduced you to the class, you had accidentally made eye contact with him. Having read through and memorised the class roster, you gave him a warm smile, making his face go stiff as red blossomed on his cheeks. You nearly laughed, but kept it together as you introduced yourself to the first years.
                You only grew closer to Burn Knuckles when you discovered that the right hand man, Jace Park, worked at the same coffee shop as you did, thus his other gang members were also frequent visitors of the cafe, once saving you from a old man that was harassing you.
                "You don't touch a girl without her permission," You clearly remember Euntae Lee saying, as he glared at the man, who had tried to lean over the counter to touch your arm, and kept an iron grip on his wrist. "You're a bad guy. And bad guys must be punished."
                You had thanked him profusely afterwards, making him blush and avert his eyes, mumbling for you to call him 'Vasco'. As a way to express your gratitude, you talked to the manager, and succeeded in getting chocolate milk added to the cafe's list of drinks, making Vasco's eyes sparkle when he walked in the next day, seeing the new addition to the menu. How cute.
                You got along well with Burn Knuckles. Perhaps it was from your past experience with Big Deal, but you knew perfectly how to get the rowdy bunch to quieten down and listen. Of course, they loved you for your kind and unbiased nature - but they also loved your food. You grew close enough for them to comfortably call you noona.
                You felt relieved when Vasco gained new friends. Of course, they were an enigmatic bunch, almost as comedic as Vasco was, but you were grateful nonetheless. At least he had friends outside Burn Knuckles - not like it was a bad thing.
                Rumors were starting to circle. An illegal betting ring was starting to gain popularity, especially among students. You knew because one of your coworkers, John, had tried to borrow some money from you, though you wisely declined when he explained it was for betting.
                One of Vasco's friends, unfortunately, got caught up in the betting ring. You felt pity, as you stared down at the scrawny boy in front of you, looking like he was one sentence away from weeping his heart out at his money lost.
                Daniel Park, one of Vasco's friends, had called upon you late at night, requesting for your presence at a nearby convenience store. Apparently, they had been trying to help the boy get back his money, though literally nobody there was good enough at consoling him. Biting back a sigh, you tell Daniel you'd be there in five minutes.
                You smile kindly down at the boy, Jiho, who looks at you like a deity descended from heaven as his tears dry up almost instantaneously. "Don't be sad, we'll help you get your money back." You say. "Did you meet the people who ran the site, though? It'll help a lot."
                Jiho nods his head vigorously, smiling gratefully up at you through his thick lenses. "I did!" He exclaims in affirmation. "I know their names, too. This guy named John introduced me to the leader." You suppressed a sigh. Of course John was the one that made Jiho this messed up.
                "I don't know the leader's name, but he presented me to another guy, Jake Kim." Your heart stilled. Staring at Jiho, your head swam as your breathing became uneven, the loud thumping of your heart in your ears drowning out whatever Jiho was saying. Jake Kim? There was no way he would involve himself in illegal betting rings.
                "Jiho?" The boy paused in his rambles to look up at you, a small chill running up his spine as he sees the scary expression on your face, a blank yet terrifying aura around you, extremely unlike the usual kind and warm one you present people with. "What did Jake Kim look like?"
                "A-ah..." He paused, recalling the brief interactions he had with the teen. "He was very tall... and he had a lot of hair gel."
                Without the given circumstances, you would have laughed out loud. Of course the best way to identify Jake Kim was by his overly-gelled hair.
                But Jiho watched in surprise as you trembled slightly, a wild torrent of emotions clouding your eyes as you clutch his shoulder tighter. "Noona... are you okay?"
                At this point, you were acutely aware of the number of eyes watching your reaction in concern, ready to step in and console you at any moment.
                "Ah..." You lift your head, any trace of your previous panic attack gone in the blink of an eye as you smile widely at everyone. "Sorry, guys. I used to know a Jake Kim, but it must be a different guy." You laugh falsely, the sound grating your eardrums. "I need to get going now, my aunt's probably worried not knowing where I am." You bid them a quick goodbye, speedwalking away from the convenience store.
                Daniel Park watches you leave with furrowed eyebrows, staring at  your hunched form in worry. 'Strange,' He thinks to himself. 'For a moment there... she looked hurt.'
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                Jace watches in sheer horror and shock as Jake Kim mercilessly pummelled Vasco to the ground, the former boy's fists soaked in blood. "Whew..." Jake hums, wiping his chin with one bloodied knuckle, sounding like he barely even broke a sweat. "You're persistent. It's impressive you managed to hang in like that." Jace clenches his fist.
                "Hey, friend." Jake Kim averts his gaze to Jace, who was still standing there in shock, disbelieving. "Take him and leave."
                With a start, Jace shifted his stance, clenching his fist as he prepared himself to attack, though his legs trembled in fear.
                "Hm? You want to fight now?" Jake nearly laughed, teasing the big-eared boy in front of him. "Did you hold yourself back not to embarrass your boss?" Jace merely stays silent, though a word from Vasco made him pause.
                "It's okay, Jace." The boy strains out, slowly getting up from the ground, his arms trembling from the effort. "I... will win."
                "Y-you can't!" Jace sputters out, helping his friend up from the floor, allowing Vasco to painfully lean some of his weight on him. "Vasco..."
                "I promised [Name] I would defeat bad guys." Vasco reassured, keeping his gaze levelled on Jake. "I won't disappoint her."
                "[Name]?" Jake softly repeats, his fighting stance relaxing as he stared at the two boys in front of him with a faraway look in his eyes. Shit, he should've realized how familiar that determination in Tabasco's eyes were. "You guys know [Name] [Last Name]?"
                Vasco exchanges a look with Jace, before simultaneously glaring protectively at Jake. "What's it to you?" Jace was the first to reply with a guarded look.
                "She's someone I knew a while back." He shakes himself out of his stupor, a small, bitter smile on his face. "I should've just listened to her instead of being so stubborn."
                "Here's the 100 million won for the month." Yeonhui places the last box of cash right beside Jake, her tone brusque. "Counted all of it with the girls."
                "Wait, hold on." Jake checks his clipboard again, eyebrows furrowed. "We were definitely a few million won short just yesterday. Did I count wrongly?" He looks up at Yeonhui, who suddenly had a shifty look in her eyes, glancing towards the door. Dread piled in Jake's gut as he thought of the worse. "Yeonhui, what did you do?"
                The woman's eyes widen. "We didn't sell our bodies or anything, you dimwit!" She whacks the man over the head, ignoring the bump that was beginning to form. As Jake nurses his skull with a small pout, she hesitates a little, looking at the empty peg with a Hello Kitty sticker pasted above it hanging on the wall. Jake recognized whose peg it was almost immediately - you used to hang your Big Deal coat on the same peg.
                "We just had a little extra help." Yeonhui finally says, her tone absolute, with no room for arguments. She pauses, as if fighting herself mentally, before taking out a small piece of paper and tossing it to Jake. "Read it. I'm going to tell everyone not to come in for the next half hour, you're going to need the privacy."
                And before Jake can reply, the woman had already sped out the door, shutting it firmly behind her. With nothing better to do, the man shrugs, unfolding the paper carefully. His heart drops as he reads the first line, and he has to lower the letter and stare blankly at the boxes of cash surrounding him, take a deep breath, and continue reading.
                'Dear Jake', the letter read. 'I hope this letter finds you in good health. I told Yeonhui to give this to you once things have settled down, or when you find out you've magically had a few more million won than before. I know you hate me because I wasn't there for Big Deal when you guys needed me the most, and I understand if you never want to see me again. I've moved to another part of Seoul because my aunt found a better paying job, and a part of me has moved on from whatever happened between us. For all it is worth, I'm sorry I wasn't by your side to support you through this tough time. Gun and Goo sound like a pair of cruel bitches. I'm sorry I wasn't able to protect Sinu, or keep Samuel from leaving Big Deal. He came to me, a few months after I'd left, with an offer to join his new sponsor, Workers. Of course I declined; even if I'm gone, I still love and cherish Big Deal with all my heart. My coat still hangs proudly in my room, and I wash it every month!
                'I'm not angry at you for acting as you did, Jake. I know that what I did, from your point of view, was wrong. I'm truly sorry. I know there's no way I can make up for what I did, but I'm trying, a little at a time, to help you. It must be tough for you, this new role and responsibilities that come with it. I'm sorry I'm not there to make it easier for you. Yeonhui's still sending me the tracklist for the 100 million won per month, and I'm still helping her calculate profits and suggest methods to increase them. Auntie's making more money than before, so sometimes I can slip in a few million won to help. I'm sorry if it's too little, I can send more if you want.
                'How is everyone at Big Deal? Does Jerry still have that little pink bike of his? Has Jason bought new shoes yet? Those red ones were looking really torn the last time I saw them. Tell Brad I love the nail art designs he sends me. If Yeonhui's still crying at night because she misses Sinu, give her a hug for me. I'm happy now. Even if you choose to forgive me, don't look for me, please? We'll all be okay if we just stick to now, forever. I'm sorry Jake. I hope you can forgive me.
                Yours truly,
                [Name] [Last Name]'
                Jake's eyes begin to water as he reads the last line. Then he finds himself rereading it from the first line again, until the tears in his eyes blur his vision and drip down onto his pants in little droplets. He stays like this for the next hour, reading and rereading, until he burns each and every word written from your soul deep into his aching heart.
                Vasco and Jace shared a curious look. They've never heard their senior speak of this strange, overly-gelled up man before, but a loud laugh from nearby made their heads whip towards the noise.
                "Well, this is interesting." The voice hums, as a man wearing tinted sunglasses appears, a cruel smirk on his face. The blood drains from Jake's face, and his fists clench tighter than ever. "You," he grits out, eyes blazing.
                "It's been a long time, Jake. How have you been?" Gun Park asks, in an almost amicable tone.
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                Another year passed, and you were now an official J High graduate, working full-time at the cafe instead of part-time. The pay was much better, and the manager, a middle-aged woman, was kind enough to give you a bonus every two months, since you were one of her best and most loyal workers, which you deeply appreciated.
                The illegal betting ring situation was still plaguing the back of your mind, since you had heard rumors that Big Deal's leader was now in juvenile detention, but you currently had more issues to deal with than to dwell on it forever, like how the stupid espresso machine wasn't working again.
                As you wrestle with the insides of the demonic espresso machine, your mind flutters back to a few days ago, when Daniel Park had paid you a visit.
                "Jake Kim" Small Daniel says as soon as he sits down in front of you. You pause in your work, turning your head towards the shorter boy to give him a close-eyed smile. But even he could see through your mask.
                "I don't know what you're talking about, Daniel." You say, clenching tightly on the cup in your grasp, your words an underlying threat.
                The boy's adam's apple bobs nervously, but he still stares straight into your eyes fearlessly. You falter, previously wide smile dropping as you sigh, and Daniel catches a glimpse of pure exhaustion on your face.
                Setting down the cup, you motion for another worker to take over as you disappear in the back, probably to ask for a break, appearing once more as you take a seat opposite Daniel.
                "You got me," You say, shrugging carelessly, though inside, your heart was thumping loudly. "What do you want?"
                "You..." Daniel Park hesitates. "You know what happened to Sinu Han, right?"
                You hum in affirmation. A few weeks after your disgraceful step-down, Jason had secretly paid you a visit, telling you everything you had missed, including how Sinu had sold Big Deal.
                "Sinu Han's in an affiliation called Workers now, in the Second Affiliate. It's one of the Four Major Crews." Daniel Park explains, not missing a beat. "I want you to help us take down the Second Affiliate, by meeting Sinu Han."
                He doesn't expect you to laugh loudly, leaning back on your chair with faux relaxation. "I'm assuming I'm not the only one you came to with this offer." You hum, and Daniel Park tenses.
                "No," He admits truthfully. "I was planning on telling Jake Kim, too."
                He watches as you sigh, turning your head to look out the window, a faraway look in your eyes. He follows your gaze. A group of high schoolers were outside, laughing and shoving each other playfully. The picture of adolescent innocence.
                "You can make up with him," He presses stubbornly. "I don't know what happened between the two of you, but I know you guys can fix it-!"
                You smile, and Daniel is taken aback. It isn't your usual carefree and heartwarming grin, more like a pained and tired one. "If only it was that easy," You mumble, mostly to yourself. "Once upon a time, I would have wanted to. But now...?" You give him a helpless shrug. "He made it clear he hates me. Why should I be the one making the effort in saving a relationship he clearly doesn't want to preserve?"
                Daniel Park stares at you, with tears glistening in your eyes, and it finally dawns on him. "You liked him." He whispers, and you smile sadly back at him, not saying a word.
                "I'll send you the location," He stands up abruptly, eyes still ablaze with determination. "Exactly one week from now, my friends and I will be taking down the Second Affiliate."
                "Good luck, then." You hum, also standing up. "Goodbye, Daniel."
                Now is exactly a week from when he paid you a visit.
                Staring down at the address he gave you, you bite back a sigh as your head spins. Fuck.
                "I'm leaving early," You call out to your manager as you toss your apron on the front desk. "I'll make up for it some other time."
                "Alright, dear." She replies, smiling gently at your silhouette as you practically race out of the door. "Go chase that boy," She hums.
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                Sinu Han was happy.
                Rather, he felt more regretful than happy. But seeing the gang he worked so hard to shape bowing in front of him, shouting their heartfelt greeting, even after not seeing or remembering him for three years, made his heart swell and his body feel so positively full. Big Deal was complete. But...
                "Where's [Name]?" Jake freezes as he catches Sinu's mumble, as Jerry, Brad and Jason exchange nervous glances. "Where's [Name]?" Sinu repeats, louder this time, as his voice carries for miles.
                His heart thumping wildly, Jake slowly looks up to see Sinu wide-eyed, afraid for the worst outcome. Shit, he thinks. If he finds out, he might lose his mind-!
                "I'm here, I'm here." A melodic female voice rings out, as everyone's head darts towards the entrance of the room, wide-eyed. "Jeez, no need to get all worked up."
                Jake's breath got caught in his throat.
                There you were, standing at the entrance, your Big Deal coat hanging loosely off your shoulders. Hands in your pocket, head tilted as you cooly regarded your former gang.
                Jake should have been happy to see you, alive and healthy. And yet...
                You silently walked through the neat formation, coming to a stop in front of Sinu, not even acknowledging Jake, who was beside him. The air was tense.
          ��     "Welcome back, Sinu-oppa." You say blandly, forcing a tight smile on your face. "It's been a long time." Sinu smiles down at you, not sensing your awkwardness as he pats your head, making you freeze up.
                "Thanks, everyone." He says, a single tear dropping from his eyes. "How's everyone doing-?"
                "Sinu..." Another feminine voice mumbles in Japanese. "What are you doing?" Everyone turns towards the source of the voice, a small, trembling Japanese woman sitting on the couch. "You're joking, right?" She chokes out. "Stop fooling around. I'm not in the mood for this. You better cut it out." Mitsuki Sohma raises her head, a downright creepy look on her face as she shrieks at Sinu. "YOU NEED TO FIGHT FOR ME!!"
                A resounding slap echoes through the room as everybody sucks in a breath.
                "Cut that shit out," You glare down at Mitsuki, your hand stinging from the force of smacking her. "Stop running after a man that'll never love you. Whatever delusions you keep feeding yourself, that one day Sinu's going to marry you or something, you better force them out of your brain and flush them down the toilet before I do it for you."
                Everyone around you hold their breath as they stare at you, who was still scowling at the Japanese girl, holding her cheek as she trembled violently, tears running down her face.
                A chill suddenly runs through the room, and the hairs at the back of your neck rise. You slowly turn around, watching as the fearless gang you once knew part like the Red Sea, making way for a blonde Japanese man in a white coat whose face was so blank it made your heart nearly stop in fear.
                Kuroda Ryuhei. You've heard of him before. The leader of an infamous biker gang in Japan, rumored to have come all the way to Korea in pursuit of a woman 'like no other'. The rumors were true, then, you think, as you silently watch him pick up Mitsuki, bridal style, carrying her over to a sofa nearby, before turning around with an unsettling smile on his face.
                "Oi," Kuroda Ryuhei finally speaks in Japanese, the smile still on his face. "Who made her cry?" Nobody dared to speak, and you could feel the man's temper rise. He turns back to Mitsuki, and you glimpse his eyes becoming tender. "Hey, cutie." He hums softly. "Tell me, was it them?" He angles his head towards Jake and Sinu. "Tell me what you want me to do." And a chill runs down your spine as you hear the next sentence that comes out of this psycho's mouth. "If you want me to kill them, I will."
                "I did," The words fly out of your mouth faster than you had expected. At the corner of your eye, you see Jake's eyes widen; he clearly didn't expect you to defend them like this. "I made your girl cry." Your heart thunders in your ears as Kuroda Ryuhei slowly turns to look at you, and he looks almost amused to see another girl, besides Mitsuki, in the room.
                "You?" He hums. "Listen here, princess. I don't usually hit girls, but if you really made Mitsuki cry, I'm going to beat you up."
                "Come at me, then." You challenge, stepping closer to the blonde as you glare straight at him. "Let's see what the great Kagiroi is made of."
                I didn't mean that! You want to scream, but it's too late, as the biker's grin widens, and he pulls back his fist, prepared to punch you. You brace yourself as your life flashes before your closed eyes, and you hear the thud of flesh against fist, and you feel yourself fly back a little, but the hit never lands on your body.
                The smell of gel hits you first, then the familiar warmth. And as you slowly open your eyes, you feel Jake Kim's big, strong arms wrapped around you as his bicep blocks the punch, the shape of Kuroda Ryuhei's fist still heavily dented in his coat. "Don't you dare touch her," The man downright growls, his eyes ablaze with protectiveness. You flush a little, feeling the eyes of hundreds of Big Deal members looking at the two of you in shock.
                Ryuhei quietly observes the two of you, watching as Jake slowly releases you from his grasp, and you mutter a quiet thanks, the atmosphere between the two of you tense and awkward.
                "Ah," He suddenly smiles, and the two of you look at him. "You're just like me and Mitsuki." You flush a little at the comparison, and glare at him more heatedly, as Jake looks between the two of you in confusion, having known nothing of what the blonde had said.
                "Well, no matter." Ryuhei's smile disappears, and his intimidating aura returns. "He is willing to fight for you, no? Then I'll just kill him instead, for making Mitsuki cry." He leaps at the members of Big Deal, just as dozens of hands grab you and pull you behind the thick horde of Big Deal members, as the men protect you from the biker's wrath.
                You are lost in a sea of red, black and white, the iron tang of blood burning heavily in your nostrils.
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                Big Deal streets smelled like home. You found yourself sat on a small plastic stool, blankly staring at the long rows of tables, filled to the brim with Korean street food of every kind. The place was abuzz; the smell of tteokbokki, ramyun, stir-fry and soju mixed together with the loud shouts and laughter of the members around you.
                You shifted slightly in your seat, self conscious of the gazes trained on your body. It was no secret that you were apparently the 'Fallen Angel of Big Deal', infamous for abandoning them during their downfall. The rumors went wild, but after Jake had explained the situation after reading your letter, they grew extremely protective of keeping your namesake safe, rumored to be going around and beating anyone who dragged your name in the dirt.
                Yeonhui and the girls quietly welcomed you with open arms. It was silently agreed that everyone would keep the fact that you had left for a while out of their mouths, until Sinu became a bit more mentally stable. For now, you just had to act normal around everyone - especially Jake.
                Speaking of Jake... your face grows hot as you recall how he had protected you with his body from getting punched by Kuroda Ryuhei. You knew it had to hurt; his arm was slightly trembling as he checked on you, pretending like it wasn't painful to move it around.
                Which is how you found yourself outside the warehouse you knew Jake would be inside. You stare at the door, mentally berating yourself for standing there like an idiot, because every time you tried to knock, your feet would just carry you away, before you walked back to the warehouse, embarrassed. If anyone had seen you, they'd think you were mentally ill.
                Finally, you throw all caution to the wind and knock sharply. "Jerry, I told you not to disturb me." His familiar voice grumbles from inside. albeit slightly muffled, and you deadpan. "It's not Jerry." You say clearly, your lips twitching as you listen to the clatter of an object hitting the floor, followed by rushed scrambles of someone with worn shoes rushing for the door, and you swallow your smile as you come face to face with a disheveled, wild-eyed Jake, clearly not expecting you to visit him.
                The boy breathes your name out, his eyes wide as saucers, and you shuffle your feet a little, suddenly feeling self-conscious. "Hi," You mumble a little. "You, um... weren't at dinner."
                "I- yeah." Jake nods along awkwardly. "I wasn't really hungry."
                "Oh," You nod along, and the silence is defeaning.
                "Um... did you need anything?" Just as he speaks, panic flashes in his eyes as he struggles to explain his seemingly rude words. "I'm not trying to be rude or anything! Sorry, I-"
                "It's fine," You crack a small smile. "I brought some ointment. Those hits must've really hurt." You hold up the small plastic bag you'd brought along, and Jake nods a little, smiling awkwardly as he opens the door wider to let you in.
                The first thing you are hit with is how poor the room looks. You weren't kidding. The walls were peeling, the cabinets were rusty, the light was flickering on and off, and the rugs were so brown you never could have imagined that it used to be royal blue - unless you were the one that bought it.
                You clicked your tongue as you pulled out a char to sit beside Jake, digging through your bag of first aid supplies. "Do you not clean this place anymore? How irresponsible of you."
                Jake cracks a small smile as he watches you unscrew the lid of your ointment, scooping out some of its contents, fondness shining clearly in his eyes. "I can't seem to do anything without you by my side, I suppose." He says softly, shyly testing the waters.
                It works, he thinks, as he sees your movements falter and your ears burn red. "Don't test it." You warn, but Jake knows there's no real bite behind your words. His smile grows wider.
                The two of you fall into comfortable silence as you tend to his wounds, as Jake admires your soft face and beautiful features. Fuck, he was an idiot for letting you go. Maybe it was the post-fight haziness, but he felt like he was on cloud nine just with your touch.
                Feeling his gaze on you, you look up from beneath your eyelashes, and Jake nearly has a heart attack. "What?" You say shyly, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear.
                Jake thinks he wants to start over with you. He wants to start his life with you. And as he searches your eyes, looking for the confirmation he needs that, just maybe, you felt the same way too, he decides to pop the question.
                "Forgive me?" He whispers, and you gulp, acutely aware of how close his face suddenly was to yours. Your mind goes blank. Even after years, he still looks so good, he's able to make your heart flip and butterflies dance to Moonlight Sonata in your stomach.
                Who cares about the past, You think hazily, smiling a little as you remember one particular memory. "Yeonhui told me you cried for an hour after reading my letter." You whisper instead, shifting your face away as you close the lid of the ointment, bending down to place it back into the plastic bag as you bring out a roll of bandages.
                You enjoy watching as Jake's face falls from the corner of your eye, content with torturing him just a little bit more. "I told her not to tell anyone," He groans, running a palm down his face.
                "Mm, I don't think so." You dance around him with your words as you begin to wrap his scar-littered arms, acutely aware of the muscles flexing beneath your touch. "Practically the whole of Big Deal knows, even without Yeonhui saying anything. She may have only told me, but even a fool could guess."
                He watches you quietly, a tinge of playfulness in his voice as he replies. "Well, I guess I'm a fool for you." He replies, and you snort. Jake's face positively lights up, and you are immediately reminded of a puppy being told 'good boy'.
                He is silent until you finish wrapping the bandages, before whispering once more, "Forgive me?" You tie your plastic bag up, straightening your back to stare directly into Jake's hope-filled eyes.
                And finally, you crack a smile, and the charming grin on Jake's face spreads wider. "I thought it was obvious I've already forgiven you?" You murmur with a small smile.
                And when Jake Kim leans forward to kiss you, fireworks explode and swan perform mating dances in your brain.
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atinystraynstay · 9 months ago
Text
Off Limits - Jeong Yunho
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MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Synopsis: Going to college for you was very serious. Nothing could stand in the way which meant often rejecting social events and saying no to anything to risk. That was until you met Yunho, someone you would risk it all for.
Pairing: College!Jeong Yunho x fem. reader
Genre: mutual pining, strangers to friends with benefits - MINORS DNI
Contains: mentions of celibacy, mentions of alcohol consumption, nudity, oral (f. receiving), fingering (f. receiving), dirty talk, slight begging, protected intercourse, characters losing their virginity, orgasm
Note: based on a request from @jonghoslvt ☆ no joke, I adore you and never thought you'd take up my offer. I really hope this doesn't disappoint because I literally fell in love with the idea the moment you hit my inbox
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Word Count: 7.8k
"But y/n, it's not even a frat party," your best friend whined. "Yeah! We're too old for that anyways," your other friend chimed in.
You currently found yourself in a standoff. At first, you had situated yourself in your bed with your textbooks to have a quiet night in. Your friends, however, took it upon themselves to propose an alternative idea. One that you often rejected.
"Are you forgetting that we have midterms next week? I would like to start spring break stress-free."
Your entire life has been focused on going to college. If asked about your childhood, you would always recall how happy you were growing up. But you never overlooked the sacrifices your parents made for you. Going to college was never realistic or them, so they worked overtime I order to provide you with the opportunity to live a better life than they ever got a chance for. Their struggles were something you can never ignore, which made you want to work hard to make them proud.
And since getting to college, it was about doing well to be able to show them why their hard work was worth it. You also had a personal goal of being able to afford to repay them for everything.
To get to that point, that meant often saying no to social obligations so you could study. Your weekends often looked like you were crammed in the library. Or, if you needed human interaction, propping yourself at a coffee shop to mix in with the crowd.
Breaks were the opportunities to let loose and have a little bit of fun. Yet, your breaks often looked like doing work for internships. Now that senior year has arrived, you are also adding in time to scroll through LinkedIn and Indeed for potential job openings
"Y/n, I adore you, and what a little studious bookworm you are. However, it is senior year. We have less than 3 months to make stupid decisions before adult obligations. There is also the chance we might not be living even in the same state or country! Do you really want to live life only when we come to visit or you visit someone else?"
You never went to a frat party. You never had a random hookup. You always played things safe.
You couldn't help but let out a sigh as you gazed down at your lap where your textbook rested. She had a point. While you were very excited about being that true adult version of you, you weren't ready for the hard parts of it like no longer living with your best friends or really having little interaction.
"And I'll tell you what. We don't have to stay all night. If you get overwhelmed or are over it, we will come straight home and watch Love Is Blind."
You perked up at her compromise. When you looked up, hopeful eyes were staring back at you before you silently nodded. That was enough to send them into squeals and start to drag yourself out of bed.
What were you getting yourself into?
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Little did you know, across campus, a similar debate was going on.
"Guys, I really don't like house parties like that," Yunho huffed. "And how do you know if you've ever been?" Mingi challenged him.
Yunho couldn't help but narrow his eyes on his best friend. He had a point, but damn, did he hate it when he was right. Out of the two them, Mingi was the more social one. Before a party was finalized, Mingi was already receiving texts about the details so word could spread like wildfire.
On the other hand, Yunho often opted for quiet nights in. He would spend nights either gaming with Seonghwa or drinking at home with a few friends. What was the point in going to a house party when they already had beer in their apartment?
There was also a part that loved hearing Mingi's retelling of what went down. Yunho simply didn't like parties, the situations that could arise from consuming too much alcohol, and the morning recovery.
"You owe me!" "For what?!"' "I mean," Mingi began. "I am your best friend. I'm sure you owe me something!"
Yunho rolled his eyes but couldn't fight the smirk curling onto his lips. It amused him greatly the antics Mingi always tried getting into, and how he basically became a whimpering puppy for attention.
"What will you do for me if I go?" Yunho challenged. "I will literally never ask you to come out again if you absolutely hate it. Or I will do all the chores in the house for the next month."
That caught Yunho's attention instantly. He liked to consider himself a very clean man, never knowing who might step into their humble abode. However, Yunho still liked to maintain a welcoming household and seemed like he had things together. First impressions mattered the most to him. And it was no secret Mingi often dirtied up any clean space, no matter how recently Yunho finished cleaning.
"Wait? Are you being serious?"
With Mingi cleaning, that meant that Yunho could just spend time the way he wanted to - playing video games and chilling with his friends. Yunho definitely was a person who liked being around people, but he didn't like situations that could get messy quickly. Hence why there was a slight aversion to going to parties where things could go 0 to 100 too quickly.
At home, Yunho was in control. He was the mood maker who kept a warm, welcoming environment. That meant one that was clean and safe for everyone. An oasis from the chaos of university.
"I'm dead serious, Yunho." "Deal!"
Little to Yunho know just how overwhelming the atmosphere would be. Even though Yunho certainly liked making memories with his friends, he was almost intimidated. All around him were drinks being passed left and right, not even knowing what was in the drink but it made his noise scrunch up as all he could smell was cheap perfume and alcohol. It practically burned his nostrils.
"Relax, Yunho," Wooyoung laughed. "You are about to give away that you've never had pussy before."
Yunho's head snapped towards his younger friend, a look of shock on his face. "Do you ever not think with your dick?"
"Will you ever sleep with someone? Come on. You're in college. Make a bad decision." "I'm fine with sticking to this one," Yunho sighed.
It wasn't that Yunho didn't want to have sex. However, he knew just how special being intimate with someone is. What mattered to him was waiting for the person he felt like he could be that vulnerable with. Just finding a random person and doing it sounds disgusting. Not how he wanted his first time go.
Nobody has caught his attention yet.
"Oh ease up, Yunho. Woo just is looking out for you," Mingi laughed. "But if you do find someone, bedrooms are open upstairs.
I think I'm going to be sick.
"Well, to be the bearer of good news," Jongho called out. "It seems like Yunho has a pair of eyes on him."
What was he talking about?
Slowly, Yunho looked over his shoulder whereas his friends seemed to wipe their heads around. Way to be subtle. There was this pattern that always occurred where girls seemed to have taken an interest in Yunho, but he never reciprocated. He was just content with the way things were in his life - no drama, no mess.
His eyes widened slightly at the sight behind him. There's no way.
Yunho has seen you around campus before. The two of you have never had a class together, seeing as your respective programs were in two different buildings. Yet, there were always ways you two crossed paths. You were heavily involved on campus or often in the library studying. Yunho did frequent the library, but if there was no immediate open spot available, he would leave. He always thought you were cute, but the opportunity never presented itself where he could make a move.
He didn't quite think that asking someone, a complete stranger, out on a date in the library when they were obviously busy was romantic.
To be honest, he never saw you as a party girl. You were often studying out of your mountain of textbooks or typing like your life depended on it on your laptop. He adored that side of you. When your hair was pulled back and your glasses framed your face, highlighting your big eyes.
Tonight, you opted for a different look. You ditched your sweats for a short black skirt that had a small slit on the right side. You wore a white shirt but that was mostly hidden underneath the leather jacket you wore. Your hair was downing loose curls. Your makeup also looked like it was light, but he was drawn to your cherry red lipstick.
I wonder if it also tastes like cherries.
Yet, tonight, you seemed like you had no agenda. Your eyes did glance in his direction, followed by whispers and giggles from your friends. To say his interest was peaked is an understatement.
You were someone who caught his attention. And his friends seemed to notice.
"Hey y/n," Mingi called out.
Yunho's head immediately turned towards Mingi who wore a smirk on his face. He wouldn't.
But it was too late. Mingi was already halfway across the room to greet you and your friends. And Yunho was hot on his trails.
"See you finally are breaking out of the library to join the rest of us," he commented.
You rolled your eyes before greeting him with a hug. Of course, Mingi knew you. He knew everyone. How did you two meet though? You weren't an ex-girlfriend or else you would have been over to the dorms. And you had a face that was impossible to forget. Maybe Mingi got tutoring from you?
"Don't hold your breath, Mingi. I was offered an out if I want to take it," you warned.
Your voice was just as angelic as Yunho imagined it. You often studied alone, unless you were shoved into a group project by your professors. Hearing how you speak made his heart flutter.
"Well maybe I can offer a reason to stay?"
You tilted your head in confusion. Mingi nodded over his shoulder which caused you to instinctively look over.
Everything else froze the moment your eyes met. It was like a scene from a romantic movie where the lights highlight the dream girl, music fades out. Nothing else matters at the moment besides you.
"Y/n, I want you to meet my best friend, Jeong Yunho. Yunho, be nice. This is y/n."
I was brought back to reality by Mingi gently patting me on the shoulder and giving me a slight shove. Luckily, I was quick on my feet to prevent myself from stumbling into this girl and making a fool out of myself. The wouldn't be a great first impression.
By your body language, Yunho could tell that you were out of your element. But so was he. Your eyes bounced around as you noticed your friends and his had left the two of you alone.
"Why don't we head out of here? Maybe go to the kitchen? Away from the crowds?"
Your eyes instantly lit up at his offered. The sight of you feeling relieved made Yunho felt proud, but also served as a motivating factor to ensure you always felt that content especially around him.
With a hand on your lower back, Yunho escorted you two out of the main part of the house. His eyes flickered all around to see where there were less people. However, people were playing drinking games in the kitchen. He glanced down at the cup in your hand to see you still had something to drink. The stairs, on the other hand, were vacant.
"Come on, let's go upstairs. I've been wanting to get to know you, y/n," he confessed.
Instantly, you felt your cheeks heat up. You nodded before following Yunho's lead. Your friend groups watched almost in astonishment at how quickly things progressed. Mingi was the proudest, as he played cupid after all.
As the two of you descended up the stairs, you could hear the bass of the music from below but could not quite make out the words. The loud conversations faded out to where you could just hear the footsteps of you and Yunho. You swore though you could feel your racing, and you were nervous Yunho could hear it too.
He flashed you a warm smile as he began trying the doorknob on the first door he saw.
"Occupied!" Someone shouted from within. The two of you felt yourself get hot in the face.
Quickly, he maneuvered the two of you to the bedroom across the hallway. Luckily, the door was slightly cracked and lights were off. An indicator that it was unoccupied. And to confirm, Yunho stepped in first by gently pushing the door. He let out a sigh of relief as there was no one.
"Perfect. Now I can actually get to know you."
He wanted to know me? The girl who is always studying?
He stepped out of the doorway, his back against the bedroom door to allow you inside. You thanked him with a soft smile before stepping into the room. You did notice he closed the door but also left it unlocked. It honestly made you feel a bit safer just by his gentle gaze and consideration.
Whenever you've seen Yunho walking around campus, you've always taken note of his soft aura. Maybe that's why it was so easy to lean into the potential friendship with him.
You found yourself walking into the room, sitting on the edge of the bed. Your hands flattened out the skirt so it covered a bit more of your legs. Yunho joined you, keeping a bit of space but nothing too much. Just enough so you could speak one another but be respectful and mindful of your own personal space.
"I'm surprised to see you here tonight," Yunho commented, a smile still on his lips. "You just never seemed to be the party girl." "You know me already," you laughed. "I'm honestly not but my friends want to make lasting memories before graduation," you explained.
Yunho couldn't help but chuckle which caused you to raise an eyebrow. He quickly cleared his throat, a light hue coating his cheeks.
"Sorry, I'm not laughing at you, I promise. It just seems that our friends are in the same mindset since that's why I got dragged out of the apartment tonight." "I guess it isn't so bad now that I'm here with you."
You swore that Yunho's cheeks got darker. You also noticed how his smile widened to the point his eyes became hidden. He was just too adorable.
"So mystery girl knows who I am," he chuckled again.
God, his laugh was so infectious. I could just sit hear and listen to it all day.
"And I'm surprised my campus crush knows even who I am." "Oh? I'm your campus crush?" He smirked.
Now it was your turn to blush a bit. Damn, caught red-handed.
"Well yeah. I've seen you all over with Mingi or when you are trying to study in the library. Guess you could say I've always been curious."
Yunho's ego soared. He didn't come here to get lucky, but he was. He felt as if he had one the lottery.
"There's something else I've been curious about," he admitted.
Your upper body had turned towards him. The moonlight shining from the window made your eyes sparkle. It was as if you had the whole universe in your eyes. Your head was tilted slightly, a habit Yunho was quickly learning about you and equally adored.
One hand remained at a respectful spot in the space between the two of you. Yet, his right hand reached across to cup your cheek. His thumb caressed your cheek affectionately as your eyes widened slightly. Yet, your body felt relaxed underneath his touch.
He never wanted to take things too far, but a little kiss never hurts, right?
"Is it okay if I kiss you, y/n?" He whispered.
Your name coming from his lips sent butterflies in your stomach. "Yes," you whispered back.
He offered another gentle smile before he leaned in to press his lips against yours. His lips felt soft and gentle as he didn't want to pressure you to kiss him back. But you would be a mad person if you didn't. You matched his tempo, allowing him to lead the kiss.
Tiny electric shocks were sent throughout your body. You couldn't help but allow your arms to wrap around his neck, which gave him the green light to move his hand off the bed to your knee. His warm hand caressed your exposed skin.
"I like the feeling of your hands on me," you murmured against his lips.
Fuck, Yunho, you're in trouble. Your statement made his brain all fuzzy. Yet, he didn't want to get too ahead of himself. He was almost positive you meant innocence in your statement.
His hand moved from your knee to your hip where he lifted you with ease. You gasped softly, pulling back from the kiss. You never expected him to be so strong! Your mouth was slightly open as you were positioned on his lap.
"Fuck, I'm sorry," Yunho said. "Did I move too fast?"
You turned towards him and shock your head. Your heartbeat was felt throughout your whole body. If it was anyone else, you might have gone running out the door by how overwhelmingly intense the moment felt. With Yunho? All you wanted was to stay.
"No, this is perfect," you confessed. Your one hand stayed wrapped around his neck, your fingers running through your hair. "Is this okay? I mean, I've never done anything like this before. I don't just kiss cute boys who I barely now."
Yunho couldn't help but smile softly at your sentiment. You were too sweet. "Well, maybe we can become more than strangers?" His hand caressed your side affectionately, easing any nerves left in your body.
"I'd like that," you whispered.
You were about to go in to kiss Yunho again when the bedroom door busted open. You gasped as Yunho gently moved you off, shielding your body. The people who busted in just gasped before quickly closing the door behind them, muttering apologizes.
Way to kill the mood.
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That was three weeks ago. Yunho and you kept in good contact, especially now that Mingi prided himself in bringing two of his favorite people together. Even though you and Yunho were as far from being a couple as anything else. If anything, you two were beginning to deepen your friendship.
Yunho now had a reliable person to study, with who would keep him accountable for actually getting work done. And you had someone who made life fell less lonely.
And it was a bonus that each study session ended with a makeout session at your apartment. It was almost a ritual between the two of you. At the end of the night, Yunho would make sure you had eaten before walking him. You would then offer to come in for some water or coffee, depending on what else he had going on in the evening. Which were ultimately excuses to go to your bedroom.
Never before had you felt so safe with someone. Yunho looked after you, which honestly blew you away considering how new the friendship was. Yet, for Yunho, taking care of you was a duty. Even if you weren't official, he always wanted to make sure you knew someone was looking out for you.
That was as evident as ever when you two were behind closed doors. Light kisses led to light touches. His hands often wondered to your lower back, maybe underneath your shirt to cup your bra-covered breasts. Your hands would fall on his chest, sometimes down his abs towards where his belt was. Kisses on your lips led to neck kisses then to hickies which your roommates teased you relentlessly about.
Nothing more though. You had told Yunho that you were always anxious when it came to sex. You didn't want to jeopardize everything you worked for. And Yunho always respected that, especially since he was waiting for the right person. He didn't want to regret something so meaningful. And you respected that too.
Yet, you couldn't ignore your own urges anymore. There was something powerful between the two of you. You just weren't sure how to tell Yunho how you were feeling without scaring him off.
The past three weeks have been the time of your life. He made you feel warm and fuzzy, as if you were the main character in a Nicholas Spark's novel. And Yunho felt like he was on Cloud 9 with you. He never wanted to lose that feeling.
Buzz buzz
You were currently in the kitchen of your college apartment, slicing up an apple and peanut butter. A favorite study time snack of yours. Your eyes warned over to see Yunho's name flash on your phone which instantly brought a smile on your face.
"Oh! Y/n must be talking to Yunho," your roommate teased.
You rolled your eyes but couldn't fight the smile growing on your lips. Yeah, you were down bad for him.
"Hey pretty girl, what are you up to today?" "Not studying! I got everything done." "So you have time for me?"
Your smile grew wider at his text. You literally felt your heart flutter.
"Maybe.. is it worth it though?" "Oh darling, don't you worry. I'm going to make sure you feel on top of the world." "Where are we going?" "My place? 7pm?"
You glanced at the time at the top left corner of your phone. 5:41pm. Not much time to get ready.
"Anything I should bring over?" "Just yourself. It is all I need."
Lord have mercy.
Your snack was long forgotten as you ran up the stairs. The excitement about seeing Yunho, being alone with him drove you in ways academic achievement and goals accomplished never could.
You wear wearing a loose sweatshirt and a pair of leggings. Nothing too suggestive but also easy to remove. You never wanted to go in assuming any situation, but you couldn't help but be hopeful. Your roommates also noticed your change of perspective since Yunho came into your life. They liked seeing this side of you - the side where you were allowing yourself to enjoy life rather than focus on work and outcomes.
"Make sure you say hi to Yunho for us," your one roommate teased as you rushed to grab your wallet and keys. "Should we expect you tonight or tomorrow afternoon?"
Your cheeks were a bit red, not from embarrassment. There was not one ounce that was ashamed to be so scandalous with Yunho. Maybe it was because it was your little secret, the part of your that you were allowing to flourish for the first time, that was being exposed. While you weren't sure if you and Yunho would be anything more than friends, you were safe to say you were no longer strangers.
"I'll just text you guys when I'm heading home," you laughed, trying to ease your own nerves. Yet, you felt all the butterflies in your stomach which mad you jittery.
"Oh, no need. We have your location, y/n." "Creeps," you huffed. "Or just care about your well-being! But we also know Yunho will take care of that part."
I need to get out of here. Glancing at the clock, you saw it was 6:47pm. Yunho was just a 5 minute walk away from your apartment, so you were in no rush but any excuse to get to Yunho quickly.
"Hey, I'm heading over now :)" you texted him. "Can't wait to be with you."
You waved goodbye to your roommates who sounded off in encouraging cheers. You shook your head playfully before walking out the door to Yunho's apartment. With each step, your heartbeat is faster and louder. He had you wrapped around his finger and you didn't even know how to tell him.
"Hi pretty girl," Yunho said, answering the door. His height always left you breathless. You knew you were down bad when his height is something you adore. He was dressed in a grey sweatshirt with a yellow smiley face in the middle and black sweatpants.
Gently, he stepped out of the way to allow you to enter. You smiled appreciatively before walking in and slipped off your shoes. Mingi was in the kitchen, wiping down the countertop after dinner assumedly.
"Hey y/n. I'm about to head out!" He exchanged a look with Yunho, but you were too hyper-focused on Yunho's hand on your lower back. You could basically turn into Jell-o. "I'll see you around," he snickered.
"Bye Mingi," Yunho muttered. His demeanor softened when he turned towards you though, offering that gentle smile that makes you want to do anything he says. "Wanna go up to my room?"
You nodded before taking the lead. You've been all too familiar with the staircase that led up to Yunho's bedroom. Each time you walked in front of him, Yunho struggled. He surely had the best view in the world but wanted to do his absolute best to remain respectful.
Once you arrived in his room, you were a bit taken back. This wasn't the usual setup. You were much accustomed to the floor lamp being on, his laptop ready for a movie.
Tonight, the no lights were on. Instead, he had lit a few candles that were new additions to the top of his dresser. It created a glow in the room that was warm and welcoming. It also had a smell of vanilla and cashmere, two of your favorite scents. He was a good listener. Soft, sensual music was playing in the background from the speaker by his desk.
You stepped into the room but didn't go to the bed this time. You turned towards him, keeping a bit of distance but yearning to be close to him.
"What's all this for, Yunho?"
He loved the way his name sounded from your lips. It sent shivers down his spine. He smiled gently before taking a step closer, closing the door behind him. Once again, he didn't lock it right away. Yunho was the exception in a world of boys where he was a gentleman. He always offered you an out, always a way to leave if you so choose. Yunho never placed expectations on you. He followed your lead.
"Y/n," he began. One of his hands gently reached out for yours, fingers gently wrapping around your own but not quite holding it just yet. It was endearing. "You mean so much to me. I mean, I've always been mesmerized by you, but I never knew someone could have such a large impact until you came into my life. I've never wanted to open up to someone the way I open up to you."
Your eyes widened slightly, stepping even a bit closer to Yunho. Your mind was jumping to conclusions but you did everything to stay calm.
"There is just something special between us, angel," he whispered. His hand fully slipped into yours as the other gently moved to hold your hip, keeping you close. His touch was gentle yet firm, almost as if he was begging you to say but also allowing you to move if you desired. "You complete me in ways I never imagined. Both emotionally and mentally, and our physical connection is something I'd like to explore more."
Oh my god.
"I understand if maybe that's something you never wanted with me but-" "But just kiss me. Please."
His eyes now widened this time. You were biting your lip gently as you gazed up at him with your big doe eyes.
Come on, Yunho. Get it together.
No longer hesitating, he leaned in fully to press his lips against yours. His hand squeezed your hip affectionately. Unlike the other times he's kissed you, this was more passion. He had a certain level of assertiveness that made you melt. Your hands moved from holding his to resting on his chest and the other on his arm.
With ease, Yunho picked you up which caused you squeal. He pulled back from the kiss to look up at you. You noticed this time his gaze was a bit more seductive which made you feel all tingly.
"Oh darling, I'll get you squealing for another reason soon enough," he promised you.
Your legs wrapped around his waist. You knew he'd never let you fall, so your action was more to lure him in closer. His hands moved to hold your ass, giving a playful squeeze which indeed sent your squealing again. Even though the sensations were newer to you, it felt so good when it was Yunho touching you.
Gently, Yunho tossed you on his bed. Your sweatshirt moved a bit to expose your midriff. Your hair was sprawled out on his comforter. And with the glow from the candles, Yunho swore you looked angelic.
"You can say no at anytime, darling," he promised you. His voice was in a soft tone but firm. This was serious for him which made your heart swell.
"I trust you. This is new for me too, but I want to experience it with you."
At first, he remained standing at the foot of his bed. Just enough so he could slip his own sweatshirt over his head. You couldn't help but stare at his exposed chest. He was built so beautifully.
Yunho noticed which caused him to smirk. Not wanting to be apart from you any longer, his hands gently then moved to your exposed skin. "What do you crave first, darling? I want to make sure you're all wet for me."
His words caused your cheeks to warm up tremendously. Your brain was all fuzzy just coming to realize this was actually happening. You were about to have sex with Yunho, your campus crush. This felt just too good yet nothing extraordinary has happened yet.
"Could you eat me out? I've always wanted to know what it feels like," you confessed. "Your wish is my command, princess."
His hands moved from your hips to the waistband of your leggings. He glanced up at you once more to make sure you were comfortable and okay with proceeding. You couldn't help but giggle before running your hand through his hair comfortingly, giving him the nod he needed.
"So gorgeous, y/n, baby," he murmured. His lips kissed the exposed skin of your tummy before both of his hands began to move your legging dow your legs. "You look amazing in these leggings, but I'm so honored to be the one to take them off of you." His eyes then noticed the pink lace panties that you were wearing underneath. A tiny bow was in the front which made his mouth water.
You shivered as his hands gently began to tug off your panties. It was a bit chilly in the room for which Yunho smiled apologetically.
"I'll warm you up in no time, darling." "I have no doubt, baby. I know you always look out for me." "Always," Yunho vowed.
With your leggings and panties on the floor, Yunho crotched in front of you. His hands rested on your knees gently, thumbs caressing the outer part. He was a bit surprised how you opened them almost automatically for him, but he was overjoyed to know you wanted this just as much as him.
His cock twitched at the sight of how wet you already were, a slight glisten already noticeable. "My baby girl needs me, hmm?"
"I like when you speak to me like that," you confessed, letting out a shaky breath.
Yunho moved your one leg over his shoulder as the other rested on your thigh. He wanted to make sure you were comfortable. "What? You like knowing that I want you all to myself? That I want to be selfish?"
You were propped up on your elbows, gazing down at him. Your teeth were sunk into your lower lip in anticipation. All you could bring yourself was to nod in confirmation.
"Well, y/n, sweet girl. You are mine. You've been mine since the party, so don't doubt it again."
His tongue then licked a long strip along your pussy up to your clit. You let out a loud gasp, head tilting back. His hot breath hit your pussy causing you to shiver and spread your legs a bit wider, offering yourself completely to him. He hummed in satisfaction before letting the tip of his tongue circle your clit.
Your back arched slightly off his comforter. Your eyes fluttered shut as you let yourself immerse fully into the pleasure.
He loved the taste of you. So sweet. His tongue ventured up and down your pussy before sticking into your tight hole. You let out a soft moan. It was music to his ears, knowing that he was capable of making you feel so good.
His cock was hardening by the sounds you were making. Twitching and began for attention. Soon though, he would get the relief he's always fantasized about.
You were his main priority though. He wanted this to be just as special, as meaningful for you as it was for him.
He pulled back which made your head snap down. Yunho couldn't help the small pout that formed on your lips. "Don't worry, darlin'. I'm not going anywhere." His lips began to press kisses into your thighs as his one hand left your knee to gently trace along your pussy.
"Is it okay if I finger you, angel? Just want to make sure you're stretched out for me. Don't want to hurt you."
His speech was a bit slurred, almost as if he was drunk off the taste of you.
"Please. I want to feel all of you, want to feel of this for the first time with you."
Yunho leaned down to kiss your thighs. He moved his kisses towards your clit. He could imagine the feeling might be a bit uncomfortable for you at first, so he wanted to help ease you a bit.
When his lips met your clit, he kissed it delicately before wrapping his lips around it. He began sucking on it which had you moaning sweetly. He couldn't help but smile before sliding one finger into you. His eyes looked up at you to see your mouth slightly open. Yet, your body remained relaxed on his bed.
He moved his finger in and out of your pussy slowly. He let out a groan at the feeling of how warm, how wet you were. You just felt so inviting it sent him into a frenzy. He craved more that he was struggling to hold himself back but he knew all good things come with time. His cock was straining against his pants painfully.
"I'm going to add another, sweetheart, okay?" He murmured against you. The vibration of his voice against your pussy caused you to whimper out in euphoria as you still nodded your head.
"Can I hold your hand, baby?" you begged softly.
Instantly, his free hand left your thigh to rest against the comforter for you to hold. He didn't need to be told twice. Whether it was for reassurance or to feel close to him, he would do anything for you.
Slowly, he slipped another finger into you. This time, at the feeling of how full you were, your body tensed a bit. Yet, Yunho kept his fingers still inside of you. He didn't want to rush in as he kept his gaze on you. Feeling your fingers slip into his hand, he squeezed your hand reassuringly. And this time, you squeezed back. "Keep going. Please."
His fingers moved slowly. He couldn't help but stifle the moan from his lips as he wanted to suck on your clit a bit harder, to make sure you were still feeling good. When you started moaning again, he began to curl his fingers gently into your g-spot. That made you moan louder than before, an encouragement for Yunho to proceed.
He then began to spread his two fingers apart, stretching you out properly. Your eyes widened, your breathing becoming shaky and shallow.
"Speak to me, baby girl. How does this feel?" "S-so good, baby." "Tell me what you need." "You. Please." "How do you want me? You've already got me. Right here, angel." "I want you to fuck me."
His fingers stilled inside of you as he pulled back from your clit. He looked up at you as he knew there was no going back. He knew he wanted to continue, but he just wanted to make sure you weren't too caught up in the moment. He didn't want you regret such a vulnerable moment with him.
"Are you positive?" He asked in a gentle voice. "I've never been more sure of anything."
Slowly, his fingers slipped out of your pussy. You whimpered at the lose of contact but quickly moaned when you saw his fingers enter his mouth. He sucked on them gently, humming against his digits. You've never witnessed something so attractive before. Your cheeks were flushed at the sight too.
"So delicious, angel. Thank you for letting me have a taste."
Now standing fully at the end of his bed, his hands moved to undo his belt and unzip his pants. Your eyes widened when you saw the tent in his pants. You couldn't believe he got so turned on by tasting and touching you.
Seeing the effect you had over him made you feel powerful.
Noticing you were staring, he winked at you. "You are the only one with this effect over me. Only one I ever want." His belt clinked against the floor as his pants soon joined, exposing his grey boxers. He was so hot. Does he even know that? You were going to move up to offer to jerk him off or suck him but he stopped you before your upper body could even leave his bed.
Did you do something wrong? You frowned a bit as your eyes quickly landed on his. Was he regretting going this far with you?
"Tonight is all about you, sweetheart." "But I want to make this special for you too," you frowned. "You just being here is enough to make this special. I promise."
You were a bit hesitant, wanting to be insistent on making him feel good. But with the look in his eyes the lustful gaze, you knew it was not a topic up for debate. You settled back onto his comforter as he moved to grab a condom from his bedside table.
He was a man prepared for any scenario. Whether it be one of his friends needing a condom or when a moment like this finally presented itself.
His boxers soon joined the floor. His cock instantly slapped against his abs. You noticed the veins running around the sides and the angry red tip, begging for attention. You made a mental note that you just had to suck Jeong Yunho off.
He grabbed the gold wrapper to tear it open. His right hand grabbed the base of his cock to hold it still as his left hand skillfully slipped the latex on. It just made his cock glisten, make it more appealing.
Finally, Yunho joined you on the bed. His knees rested in between your legs to keep you spread for him. His one hand rested by your head as the other cupped your cheek. You felt his forehead press against yours but not once did he look away from you.
"I mean it when I say we can stop at any point, angel. Just say the word." "Yunho, you're too sweet to me but I need you."
You needed him. God, his eyes nearly rolled at the words you spoke.
He pressed his lips to yours for a moment. Even the room felt hot and heavy, he wanted to remind you just how important you were to him. You kissed him back for a moment until you felt his tip against your pussy. He kept his gaze on you, wanting to make sure you were okay with what happened.
"You ready?" "Yeah," you breathed out.
As slow as ever, Yunho pushed his tip into you. You bit you lip as you kept your eyes trained on him. It felt familiar, just like when his fingers entered you. You nodded slowly before he began to push more of himself into your pussy. His head nearly rolling back at the feeling of how warm and tight you were around him. "Fuck," he breathed out.
The sound of you letting out another whimper caused him to snap back to reality. He frowned when he noticed the tears in your eyes.
"Oh angel," he whispered. He didn't dare move another inch. This wasn't about his pleasure, this was about you. "What's wrong?" "It's just a lot," you confessed. Salty tears began to leave your eyes as you let out a shaky breath. "Do you want me to stop?" "No, no," you begged. "I just need a moment."
Yunho nodded understandingly. He began to press soft kisses along your cheeks, your nose - anything to distract you from the pressure and temporary pain. He wanted to kiss you fully but he noticed you were breathing in deeply, trying to collect yourself and he didn't want to be inconsiderate.
"Take your time," he whispered. His hand moved to wipe your tears. "I go when you say go. I stop when you say stop." You took in another deep breath, really being able to feel how deep he was as your puss instinctively gripped his cock. He bit his lip to not moan, not wanting to do something that pressured you to say go.
However, in the few seconds of regulating your breathing, the pain began to feel like pleasure. It felt good. It was an odd feeling for sure, but one you wanted to continue with.
"Yunho?" you called out gently.
He pulled back so he could look into your eyes. His lips were curled up into that signature soft smile.
"Keep going. Please."
His eyes were trained on yours, almost as if he was looking for any hesitation. Yet, when he didn't see any, he nodded his head gently.
Before continuing to slip himself into you, he offered his hand for you to hold again. He really was a gentleman. Your fingers instantly slipped into his and you gave him a reassuring squeeze. That's all Yunho needed to continue slipping into your pussy.
Your breathing hitched again, but you remembered to breathe through it. And while it was a bit uncomfortable, it wasn't as bad as when you two started. You moaned when he eventually filled you completely.
"You okay, darling?"
He kept still but you could feel all of him inside of you. You felt so close, so vulnerable with him. It was overwhelming in the best sense.
"Never been better," you breathed out.
Satisfied, he began to retreat his hips before thrusting into you. Your head rolled back against his pillows and he rolled his head back at the feeling. "God damn," he breathed out. "You feel so good, angel. All for me."
His thrusts were slow at first, at an even pace. He was treating you as if you were the most delicate thing in the world, something that needed to be fiercely looked after. And while you might have enjoyed the sentiment, you just needed him.
"Baby, go faster, please." "Fuck, are you sure? If you say yes, I might not be able to hold myself back anymore." "Let loose, baby boy." That's all he needed to hear. His hand planted firmly on the space by your head, his other hand still holding yours. However, his thrusts became quicker, became deeper. It was as if something primal took over him.
Your moans were louder as you felt all of him entirely with each threat. He was so big, so thick. He filled you up just so heavenly, in ways you couldn't describe besides perfection.
"That's it," you whined out. "Right there, baby." "God, I could die a happy man this way."
You couldn't help but giggle as you moved your free hand to rest on his shoulder. Your fingernails dug slightly into his skin which seemed to send him pounding deeper into you.
The sound of wet skin slapping made him nearly delirious. He never imagined this would be happening especially not with you. Yunho truly won the jackpot. He watched as your eyes rolled back, your cheeks a light pink color. Your lips were slightly parted as you moaned without any control.
"You're so gorgeous, y/n."
Your walls began to tighten around him, a fire-like feeling taking over your stomach. His jaw was clenched, almost as if he was concentrating. You were a bit curious but began to notice the veins protruding out of his forearms from how hard he was thrusting.
You began to put the dots together.
"Are you close, baby?" "So fucking close," he huffed out. "Are you?"
His eyes were practically glued on you. All to make sure you felt on top of the world. He loved knowing that you two were sharing this experience together. The grip you had on his shoulder further encouraged him to give you everything he had.
No room to hesitate or overthink. "Yeah," you whimpered.
Sweat was beginning to coat his skin. You early drooled at the sight of how delicious he looked. How did you get so lucky?
"Let go, y/n, baby. I'm right there with you."
With one particularly hard thrust, you lost it. You felt like you were being sent into another dimension but the intensity of your orgasm. Nothing could have prepared you for the feeling as you truly believed you saw stars. Your legs shook slightly as Yunho groaned loudly, spurting his hot cum into the condom.
The heavy breathing from the two of you filled the room. The world outside of his bedroom seemed so far away as you felt so consumed by Jeong Yunho. You wouldn't want it any other way.
His cock started to soften inside of you but you two couldn’t bring yourselves to move. Your arms moved to wrap around him softly as he laid gently on you, keeping you close.
There was no other place you wanted to be. I guess sometimes you do need to take a risk and do something that might seem like it is off-limits.
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servantofthefates · 2 months ago
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Life-Changing Money Manifestation Tip 💰
This is not a technique I learned from books, or a principle my elders taught me. It is simply something I have observed to be unfailingly effective.
I know it might seem counterintuitive, impractical, and perhaps even downright foolish. But it has been consistently true for me and the people around me.
The tip is: Never ever be frugal with money.
Even when you're afraid you won't have enough, be open-handed with your spending. Spend on your needs, spend on your wants, spend on others who deserve your generosity. Just. Keep. Spending.
The fuck, right? What if you already don't have enough to begin with?
Well, you know how they say, "Love is infinite" or "There's enough love to go around" or "Love multiplies, it doesn't divide"?
The same is true for money.
Money is energy. It just happens to have physical manifestations like coins, bills or gold.
Love too is energy. It just happens to have physical manifestations like kisses, words or gifts.
And it is common knowledge that if we wish to be loved, we must first love ourselves, and give love freely to those who are worth it. We must let love flow through us.
Same with money. If we want to have it, we must first spend it on ourselves and give it freely to those we deem worth it. We must let money flow through us.
And flow it will.
Just as it is nearly impossible for a cold-hearted person to invite love, it is also very hard for a stingy person to invite money.
I have seen this first-hand many times.
This man owned a boutique advertising agency. He gave out bonuses and free international trips to his team the way corporations give out cheap pizzas to their employees. And back then, this man's business thrived. Some months, he made more than global agencies did. And the awards were pouring in too. He was on top of the world.
Suddenly, his elderly mother got terribly sick, and he panicked. He knew he had to spend a fortune on her medical bills, and his fear got the best of him. So he cancelled the free trips. He stopped giving bonuses. Eventually, he even cut down salaries and moved to a smaller office.
One year later, his business went bankrupt. Because all his talented employees left. And with that, the trust of his clients dried out. His business — which had the potential to become an empire — ended up becoming just a TikTok trend.
Because he held on to money too tightly... money felt suffocated and walked out on him entirely.
The opposite example is me. No, I do not also own an ad agency. But I have learned to never worry about money. And since then, money has never disappointed me.
Last year, someone dear to me had been praying for a MacBook, but her parents couldn't afford it. I too couldn't afford it. Not without digging into my savings. So I did. Because I know money will always come back to me. And it did.
Two days after I placed the order, I received an email from Shareworks that my stocks were ready to be withdrawn. The amount? Double what I paid for the Mac. These stocks are released yearly, so I tend to forget about them. But they came at the right time.
And it is like this every time.
I buy a Louis Vuitton bag with money meant for my holiday. Suddenly, a friend invites me to go with them on a fully paid trip to the same country I was planning to visit.
I buy a bunch of tarot decks with a week's worth of transportation costs, and my company announces we're working from home for a week while they repair some rain damage.
I buy a box of Patchi chocolates when I'm already short on my monthly budget, and my salary gets released early because it's the holidays, and the CEO is feeling friendly.
I know life is not always as sweet as I described it to be. Sometimes, it's not about Louis Vuittons and Patchis, but about diapers and cough medicine. I am perfectly aware some people are struggling — not about holidays and tarot splurges, but about keeping the electricity on and putting food on the table. I will not pretend to know the solution to their hardships.
What I do know is there are people who are considered poor in my community who are seriously way happier than me. And I know I have had bosses who made thrice as I did who were far more miserable than me.
And that tells me that despite our different stations in life, energy is energy. And it's always best to let it flow freely.
So I repeat... never ever be frugal with money.
When it knocks on your door, say, "Hey, nice to see you!" When it leaves your house, say, "See you again soon!" And when it finally seems to be making itself at home, do not lock it in the basement. Cook dinner with it. Invite your friends over. Watch a movie. Do karaoke. Look money in the eyes and say, "I'm glad you've decided to stay."
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